Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Answer the question directly, then add one or two specific details. The response is relevant and uses good vocabulary, such as “shock absorbers” and “uneven terrain,” but some expressions are unnatural or overly complicated. Say “I often took it hiking” instead of “took to hikes quite often,” “gears” or “drivetrain” instead of “transmission,” and “I found the shock absorbers very useful” instead of “I quite found.” Avoid the awkward phrase “if you will” and divide the long sentence into shorter, clearer sentences.

예시: Yes, I did. I had a mountain bike that I often took hiking. Its gears were not very reliable, but the shock absorbers were excellent for riding over uneven terrain. I really enjoyed using it on outdoor trips.

제안: The answer gives a clear opinion and supports it with a relevant reason and comparison with buses. Improve the structure by separating the opening opinion from the explanation: “I think they are quite popular, especially among low-income people.” Use “a primary mode of transport” rather than “one of the primary modes” when referring to cycling generally, and avoid the slightly awkward phrase “get around places.” Add punctuation or linking words such as “because,” “as a result,” and “particularly for short journeys” to make the answer more natural and coherent.

예시: Yes, I think bikes are quite popular, especially among low-income people. They are an affordable way to travel, because bus fares can be expensive in my city. As a result, many people use bicycles for short journeys, such as commuting to work or going to nearby shops.

× Yes I did. I had a mountain bike that I usually took to hikes quite often, and while the transmission wasn't exactly the most reliable, I quite found its shock absorbers to be ideal in terms of going across very uneven terrain if you will, and this helped me.

✓ Yes, I did. I had a mountain bike that I usually took on hikes quite often, and while the transmission wasn't exactly the most reliable, I found its shock absorbers to be ideal for riding across very uneven terrain, if you will, and this helped me.

We normally say take a bike on a hike, not take a bike to a hike. The preposition on describes participation in an activity. For riding across very uneven terrain is also more natural than in terms of going across very uneven terrain.

× Yes I did. I had a mountain bike that I usually took to hikes quite often, and while the transmission wasn't exactly the most reliable, I quite found its shock absorbers to be ideal in terms of going across very uneven terrain if you will, and this helped me.

✓ Yes, I did. I had a mountain bike that I usually took on hikes quite often, and while the transmission wasn't exactly the most reliable, I found its shock absorbers to be quite suitable for riding across very uneven terrain, if you will, and this helped me.

The adverb quite is placed incorrectly before the verb found. Adverbs such as quite usually come before an adjective or another adverb, as in quite suitable. Alternatively, quite can be omitted: I found its shock absorbers to be ideal.

× I think so they're quite popular and especially for low income people it's one of the primary modes of transport. After all the city buses are quite expensive here so it's actually more useful for people to be able to use these bikes to get around places, especially at short distances.

✓ I think so. Bikes are quite popular, especially among low-income people, and are one of the primary modes of transport. After all, city buses are quite expensive here, so using bikes is actually more practical for getting around, especially over short distances.

The original response combines several independent clauses without suitable punctuation or conjunctions. Separating I think so from the following statement makes the structure clearer. Commas should also be used after introductory phrases such as After all and before so when it joins two independent clauses.

× I think so they're quite popular and especially for low income people it's one of the primary modes of transport. After all the city buses are quite expensive here so it's actually more useful for people to be able to use these bikes to get around places, especially at short distances.

✓ I think so. Bikes are quite popular, especially among low-income people, and are one of the primary modes of transport. After all, city buses are quite expensive here, so using bikes is actually more practical for getting around, especially over short distances.

The pronoun it does not agree with or clearly refer to the plural noun bikes. Repeating Bikes and using using bikes makes the references clear and avoids an unclear singular pronoun.

× I think so they're quite popular and especially for low income people it's one of the primary modes of transport. After all the city buses are quite expensive here so it's actually more useful for people to be able to use these bikes to get around places, especially at short distances.

✓ I think so. Bikes are quite popular, especially among low-income people, and are one of the primary modes of transport. After all, city buses are quite expensive here, so using bikes is actually more practical for getting around, especially over short distances.

We usually say popular among a group of people, not popular for a group, when describing popularity within that group. We also say over short distances or for short distances, not at short distances.