Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 回答は直接的で内容は分かりやすいですが、繰り返し（"when I was a child" と "children when I was a child"）があり、文法的に不正確な部分と冗長さがあります。改善点：1) トピック文を明確にし、繰り返しを避ける。2) 追加情報（例：誰と乗ったか、どのくらいの期間使ったか、特別な思い出など）を1〜2文で具体的に述べる。3) 文をつなぐときは接続詞（"and", "so", "because"）や時間表現（"when", "until"）を使う。

예시: Yes, I did. I had a pink bicycle that I used from age seven to twelve, and I often rode it with my friends around the neighborhood. Because it was slightly larger than my size, I remember it felt exciting to ride fast down the hill.

제안: 回答が途中で切れており、理由が不十分で具体性が欠けています。改善点：1) トピック文で立場をはっきり示す（Yes/No + short reason）。2) 理由は具体的に（通勤、通学、健康、環境など）述べ、統計や具体例を一つ挙げる。3) 接続表現（"because", "for example", "therefore"）で論理をつなぐ。

예시: Yes, I think bikes are very popular in Japan because many people use them for short commutes and shopping. For example, students often ride to school and office workers use bikes to get to nearby stations, which makes cycling a common and practical choice.

× I had a pink bicycle when I was a child, children when I was a child.

✓ I had a pink bicycle when I was a child.

The sentence repeats the time clause and inserts an unnecessary word 'children', causing redundancy and a broken structure. Remove the extra phrase 'children when I was a child' so the sentence is a single clear clause: 'I had a pink bicycle when I was a child.' This fixes the sentence structure error and avoids repetition. Suggestion: Read your sentence aloud and delete repeated phrases or stray words so that each clause appears only once.

× It is because in Japan Japanese people commit to

✓ Yes, I think so because in Japan people are very committed to cycling.

The original fragment is incomplete and ends abruptly, lacking an object or complement after 'commit to', which makes the sentence structurally incorrect. Also 'It is because' is awkward in spoken answers; combine clauses for fluency. The corrected sentence completes the thought with 'cycling' and uses 'are very committed to' to express habitual or cultural tendency. Suggestion: Ensure each sentence has a subject and a verb and completes the idea (who does what to whom/what). Use phrases like 'because in [country], people ...' to give reasons clearly.