Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and structured: start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid fillers like “uh” and combine related ideas with a linking word. Also vary vocabulary (e.g., use ‘learn to ride’ instead of ‘learn how to bike’).

예시: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. I was learning to ride it, but unfortunately it was stolen, which made me very upset. Despite that, I remember enjoying practicing in the park with my friends.

제안: Organize your response: give a direct opinion, then one or two clear reasons linked with connectors (e.g., "because" / "however"). Correct small grammar issues and avoid repetition (remove duplicated words like ‘people’). Use a specific example or consequence to support your view.

예시: I don't think bicycles are very popular in my country because most people prefer cars and motorcycles for convenience. However, I believe more people should cycle for short trips because it is healthier and reduces traffic and pollution.

× I did have a bike when I was a child and uh, I was trying to learn how to bike but it was stolen and I was really upset because of it.

✓ I had a bike when I was a child, and I tried to learn how to ride it, but it was stolen, and I was really upset about it.

The original uses 'did have' and 'was trying' which are unnecessary or awkward in simple past narrative. Use simple past for completed past events: 'I had' (rather than 'I did have') and 'I tried to learn' (rather than 'I was trying' when referring to a past attempt). Also 'learn how to bike' is non-idiomatic; use 'learn how to ride it' or 'learn to ride a bike'. Finally, use 'upset about it' rather than 'upset because of it' for more natural phrasing. Suggestion: use simple past to describe past facts/attempts and idiomatic verbs for activities.

× I don't think bikes are popular in my country because nowadays These cars and motorcycles are much more popular and people I think people should use bicycles because it's really healthy.

✓ I don't think bikes are popular in my country because nowadays cars and motorcycles are much more popular, and I think people should use bicycles because it is really healthy.

Problems: inconsistent capitalization ('These' should be lowercase 'these' or omitted), repetition and ordering issues ('people I think people' is redundant), and contraction/tense use. The sentence should use present simple to state general truths: 'I don't think', 'are much more popular', 'I think people should use'. Also replace 'it's' with 'it is' or keep contraction; ensure punctuation to separate clauses. Suggestion: remove repetitions, fix capitalization, and use clear clause boundaries.