Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammatical errors. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details. Use correct tense and avoid repetition (e.g., remove duplicate words like “which it which”).

예시: Yes, I did. I had a red bicycle that my dad gave me when I was seven, and he taught me how to ride it in our local park. I remember practicing every weekend until I felt confident enough to ride on the street.

제안: Give a clear opinion followed by specific, well-structured supporting details. Correct grammar (e.g., use contractions carefully, fix word order, avoid filler words like “like” and repeated words). Use linking words to connect ideas (for example: “because,” “for example,” “they often”).

예시: Yes, I think bikes are very popular, especially in my city. For example, there is a large community of cyclists who organize weekly rides and often travel between towns, tracking their distance with apps to measure kilometers.

× Yes, I did and I have a red bicycle which it which my dad gave me and he also taught me how to ride a bike.

✓ Yes, I did. I had a red bicycle that my dad gave me, and he also taught me how to ride it.

This sentence contains a redundant relative pronoun and a pronoun error. 'Which it which' is incorrect; use a single relative pronoun 'that' or 'which' without an extra subject. Also maintain past tense consistency: the question asks about childhood, so 'I had' is better than 'I have'. Replace 'a bike' with the pronoun 'it' to refer back to the bicycle. Suggested improvement: split into two clauses for clarity and keep tense consistent.

× Yes, bikes are popular in my country, especially in my city with there's like a community for bikers and they they travel or bike in every town and and measure every kilometers.

✓ Yes, bikes are popular in my country, especially in my city. There's a community of bikers who ride between towns and track the kilometers they travel.

Multiple problems: 'with there's' is ungrammatical; use a new sentence 'There's' or 'There is'. 'Like' as filler is unnecessary in formal responses. Use correct preposition 'of' with 'community' (a community of bikers). 'They travel or bike' is redundant; use 'ride' as the verb for bicycles. 'Measure every kilometers' has pluralization and article issues: 'kilometer' vs 'kilometers' and unnecessary 'every'; better: 'track the kilometers they travel'. Also remove repeated words 'they they' and 'and and'. Suggestions: break into shorter sentences, remove filler words, use correct collocations (community of, ride), and ensure pluralization consistency.