Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and natural: start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetitions and filler words, and add one specific supporting detail using a linking word. Keep it under five sentences.

예시: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. It was a red bicycle my father gave me for my eighth birthday, and I loved riding it to the park every weekend. Because it was lightweight and easy to handle, I learned to ride confidently within a few days.

제안: Give a clearer main idea and explain with specific reasons using linking words; avoid hesitation and awkward phrases like ‘find physique.’ Use correct collocations (e.g., 'stay fit' or 'keep fit'). Limit to up to five sentences.

예시: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country. One reason is that many people cycle to stay fit, and because riding is inexpensive and convenient for short trips. For example, in cities many commuters use bicycles to avoid traffic and save money on transport.

× Yes, I had a bike when, when I was in my childhood.

✓ Yes, I had a bike when I was a child.

Redundant and awkward phrase 'in my childhood' with 'when' creates unnatural wording. Use simple past 'had' correctly; replace 'when I was in my childhood' with the common expression 'when I was a child' for clarity and naturalness. Suggestion: Use concise time expressions with past tense, e.g., 'When I was a child, I had a bike.'

× It was gifted, uh, from my father and I really love to ride a bike.

✓ It was a gift from my father and I really loved riding my bike.

'Gifted from' is nonstandard; the noun phrase 'a gift from' or the verb 'was given to me by' is correct. Also the student is speaking about a past situation, so verbs should be in past tense: change 'I really love' to 'I really loved'. Use gerund 'riding' after 'loved'. Use 'my bike' for specificity. Suggestion: Say 'It was a gift from my father, and I loved riding my bike.'

× Yes, bikes are so common in my country because nowadays people like uh, fit and find uh, physique.

✓ Yes, bikes are very common in my country because nowadays people like to stay fit and improve their physique.

Phrase 'like fit and find physique' is incorrect. Use the infinitive 'like to stay fit' and 'improve their physique' for intended meaning. 'Are' is correct present tense; replace informal 'so' with 'very' for formality and clarity. Suggestion: Use 'like to' before verbs and pair 'stay fit' with 'improve their physique.'

× So they, so they prefer bikes and it is very, uh, convenient.

✓ So they prefer bikes because they are very convenient.

Repetition 'so they, so they' is redundant. Combine ideas into one clear sentence and provide a reason: 'because they are very convenient.' Ensure subject-verb agreement with 'they are.' Suggestion: Avoid repetitions and link ideas with conjunctions like 'because'.