Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be direct, use past tense consistently, simplify sentences and add one clear supporting detail. Avoid filler words and unclear phrases (e.g., 'bought for my board', 'he owes'). Use linking words to connect ideas.

예시: Yes. I had my own bike when I was about six. My father bought it so I could learn to cycle, and he often practiced with me in the park until I felt confident.

제안: Start with a clear opinion, then give specific reasons or examples with linking words. Remove hesitations and repeated words. Mention observed facts (e.g., numbers, events) or comparisons to make your answer concrete.

예시: I'm not completely sure, but I would say bikes are fairly popular. For example, many members of my family can ride, and there are occasional cycling competitions in my city, although some of my friends prefer cars.

× Yes, I do.

✓ Yes, I did.

The question asks about the past ('when you were a child'), so the student should use past tense. 'Do' is present tense; change to 'did' to match the time frame. Suggestion: Use past tense verbs when referring to past situations (e.g., 'Yes, I did.').

× And I think when I was six or seven years old and I have my own bike which is bought for my board from my father and he wanted me to learn how to actually cycle.

✓ I think when I was six or seven years old I had my own bike which my father bought for me because he wanted me to learn to cycle.

Multiple tense and structure errors: the sentence mixes past ('was') with present ('have') and uses incorrect passive and preposition phrases ('bought for my board from my father'). Correct to past simple 'had' and 'bought' to maintain past time reference. Use 'bought for me' instead of 'bought for my board from my father'. Use 'learn to cycle' (infinitive) rather than 'learn how to actually cycle' for concision. Suggestions: Keep verbs in the same past tense when describing past events; use 'bought' active voice and 'for me' as the beneficiary; use 'learn to + verb' for purpose (e.g., 'to learn to cycle').

× Yeah, and he owes.

✓ Yeah, and he was supportive./Yeah, and he encouraged me.

'Owes' is incorrect here; it is a present tense verb meaning to be in debt, which does not fit context. The student likely intended to say the father supported or encouraged learning. Replace with an appropriate verb phrase in past tense matching the context. Suggestion: Choose verbs that convey intended meaning (e.g., 'encouraged', 'supported').

× MMM I'm not sure about this but for my family I think most of us know how to ride a bike so my but my friends don't know how to ride a bike so I'm not sure about if if it's popular but I know there's some competition about riding a bike.

✓ I'm not sure, but in my family most of us know how to ride a bike. My friends don't know how to ride, so I'm not sure whether it's popular, but I know there are some bike-riding competitions.

Run-on sentence with tense and repetition issues. 'MMM' is filler and removed. Maintain present tense for general statements. 'Don't know how to ride a bike' is repetitive; shorten to 'don't know how to ride'. Use 'whether' instead of 'if if' and 'there are' for plural 'competitions'. Also use 'bike-riding competitions' or 'bicycle competitions' for clarity. Suggestions: Break long responses into shorter sentences, avoid repetition, and use 'whether' when expressing uncertainty; use 'there are' with plural nouns.