Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is generally clear and relevant, with a good personal story. To improve, make the response more concise and natural: start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words (for example, “because” or “so”) and avoid redundancy (e.g., don’t repeat ‘did’ or ‘then’ unnecessarily). Also vary vocabulary slightly (use words like “learned to ride,” “practice,” or “favorite pastime”). Keep it within 3–4 sentences.

예시: Yes. I had a bike when I was a child; my father bought it for me and taught me how to ride. I fell off it many times at first, but I kept practicing, so I soon became confident. Riding around the neighborhood was my favorite pastime.

제안: The answer addresses the question but has issues with accuracy, phrasing, and coherence. Avoid grammatical errors (e.g., “His bikes” should be “Yes, bikes” or “Bikes”), reduce filler words (“yeah”), and avoid making unsupported judgments (saying people ‘should’ walk). Provide clearer, specific reasons and one example, and use linking words (for example, “because” or “for example”) to connect ideas. Keep to 2–3 well-structured sentences.

예시: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because they are affordable and convenient for short trips. For example, many people ride bikes to buy groceries or to go to local markets, which is often quicker than walking. Because of this convenience, bicycles are a common mode of transport in both towns and villages.

× I did have a bike when I was a child.

✓ I had a bike when I was a child.

Using 'did have' is unnecessary emphasis in affirmative past tense. The simple past 'had' is correct and more natural. Suggestion: use simple past for ordinary statements about the past (I had).

× My father bought it for me and he taught me to ride it and I fell from it many times.

✓ My father bought it for me, he taught me to ride it, and I fell off many times.

The sequence of past actions is fine but 'fell from it' is an awkward prepositional choice; 'fall off' is the correct phrasal verb for being on a bike. Also use commas to separate clauses for clarity. Suggestion: use 'fell off' for falling from a vehicle or bicycle and add commas between clauses.

× But I did not give up and eventually I learned how to ride it then.

✓ But I did not give up, and eventually I learned how to ride it.

'Did not give up' is acceptable, but 'then' is redundant with 'eventually.' Remove 'then' and add a comma before 'and' to join independent clauses. Suggestion: avoid redundant time words; prefer 'eventually' alone.

× It was my favorite thing to do when I was little.

✓ It was my favorite thing to do when I was little.

This sentence is grammatically correct in past tense and needs no change. Suggestion: no change necessary.

× His bikes are very popular in my country and almost everyone in my country has access to a bike.

✓ Bikes are very popular in my country, and almost everyone has access to a bike.

Using 'His bikes' is incorrect and shifts perspective; the intended subject is general 'bikes.' Also 'in my country' is repeated; remove repetition. Suggestion: use the general noun 'Bikes' and avoid repeating phrases.

× They use it for daily chores like getting grocery or getting yogurt or yeah, getting milk.

✓ They use them for daily chores like getting groceries, yogurt, or milk.

Pronoun agreement: 'it' refers to singular but 'bikes' is plural, so use 'them.' 'Grocery' should be plural 'groceries' or 'grocery shopping.' Also list items should be parallel and more concise; remove filler 'yeah.' Suggestion: match pronoun number to noun and use plural nouns for items like groceries.

× And they prefer bikes over walking.

✓ And they prefer bikes to walking.

The correct preposition with 'prefer' when comparing two things is 'to' (prefer A to B). 'Prefer bikes to walking' is idiomatic. Suggestion: use 'prefer A to B' for comparisons, or 'prefer to walk rather than use bikes' depending on meaning.

× I think that should be changed and they should try to walk.

✓ I think that should change, and people should try to walk more.

'That should be changed' is passive and a bit unclear; 'that should change' is more natural for a general situation. Also 'they' is vague—use 'people' or 'people in my country.' Add 'more' to clarify the intended increase in walking. Suggestion: use clearer subjects and add adverbs like 'more' for clarity.