Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve grammar, clarity and fluency. Start with a clear past-tense topic sentence, avoid repetition and filler words, and add one or two concise supporting details (how you used the bike or a memory). Use linking words (for example, after, so) to make the sequence clear. Keep the answer within 2–4 sentences.

예시: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My father bought it for me after I passed an important school exam, so I remember feeling very proud. I used to ride it around the neighborhood every afternoon, often racing my friends to the park.

제안: Clarify the main idea and correct vocabulary. Begin with a clear opinion sentence about bikes (not cars). Remove fillers and repetitions, use linking phrases (for example, especially, because) and provide specific examples of how and why children use bikes. Keep it to 2–3 concise sentences.

예시: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country, especially among children and teenagers. For example, many kids use bicycles for play and short journeys, and some even ride to school because it is cheap and convenient.

× Yes I have a bike.

✓ Yes, I had a bike.

The examiner asked about the past ('when you were a child'), so the student should use past tense. 'Have' (present) is incorrect in this context; use 'had'. Also add a comma after 'Yes' for clarity.

× When I was a child I enjoyed a lot to ride through bicycle and I when I passed my my PSA exam then my my father bought it for me.

✓ When I was a child I enjoyed riding my bicycle a lot, and when I passed my PSA exam my father bought it for me.

Multiple issues fall under allowed types: 'enjoyed' should be followed by a gerund (verb + -ing), so 'enjoyed riding' not 'enjoyed to ride'. 'Through' is incorrect preposition; use nothing or 'on' but here 'ride my bicycle' is natural. 'My my' and extra 'when' are repetitions to remove. Word order and comma usage improved to join clauses. Ensure past tense consistency ('enjoyed', 'bought').

× Yes, I think by car so popular in my country, especially among the young children, umm, they uh, they use it for various purpose for uh, for playing or, or sometime in necessary tasks like they go to school through the bicycle.

✓ Yes, I think bicycles are very popular in my country, especially among young people; they use them for various purposes, such as playing or sometimes for necessary tasks like going to school by bicycle.

This sentence had several structural and word-choice errors. 'By car so popular' is nonsensical; the intended subject is 'bicycles' and the verb 'are' matches plural. 'Young children' can be true but 'young people' fits broader use; choose based on meaning. 'Various purpose' should be plural 'various purposes'. Use gerund forms after prepositions: 'going to school'. 'Through the bicycle' is incorrect preposition; use 'by bicycle' or 'on a bicycle'. Remove filler words and repeated fragments and correct punctuation.