Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Keep your answer direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition (e.g., saying "in the afternoon, in the evening" then "doesn't matter what time"). Also correct small grammatical errors and use varied vocabulary (e.g., "bike" and "bicycle" consistently, and use past continuous or simple past correctly).

예시: Yes — I had a bike when I was a child. I used to ride it with my friends every afternoon, and we often cycled to the park for hours because we enjoyed racing and exploring new streets.

제안: Answer directly, then give one clear reason and a specific example. Avoid unclear phrases and grammar mistakes (e.g., "in need of a bias" is unclear). Use linking words like "because" or "for example." Be careful with subject-reference (children force their parents to buy them a bike).

예시: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country because many families encourage cycling for recreation and exercise. For example, shops often offer discounts during school holidays, and parents frequently buy new bikes when their children grow taller.

× Yes, I did have a bicycle when I was a child and it was very fun to ride bicycle with my friends in the afternoon, in the evening.

✓ Yes, I did have a bicycle when I was a child and it was very fun to ride a bicycle with my friends in the afternoon and in the evening.

Missing article before 'bicycle' and awkward coordination. Insert the indefinite article 'a' before 'bicycle' because singular countable nouns require an article. Replace the comma between 'afternoon' and 'in the evening' with 'and' for clearer coordination. Suggestion: Use 'ride a bicycle' or 'ride bicycles' consistently; for example, 'ride bicycles with my friends' or 'ride a bicycle with my friend.'

× And it doesn't matter what time of the day it was, we were so immersed in fun that we forgot the time.

✓ And it didn't matter what time of day it was; we were so immersed in fun that we forgot the time.

Tense inconsistency and article phrasing: the context is past, so use past tense 'didn't' not 'doesn't.' Also, 'time of day' is the idiomatic expression without the definite article 'the.' Use a semicolon or a period to separate the clauses for clarity. Suggestion: Keep past tense throughout and use idiomatic expressions: 'it didn't matter what time of day it was.'

× Yes, bikes are very popular in my country and even all the bicycle shops sell them with discounted prices because it's so popular within children that they force their parents to buy themselves a bike every year or whenever they grow up and in need of a bias.

✓ Yes, bikes are very popular in my country and many bicycle shops sell them at discounted prices because they are so popular with children that children often pressure their parents to buy them a bike every year or whenever they grow and need one.

Multiple problems: pronoun reference and agreement, article/preposition use, word choice, and spelling. 'All the bicycle shops sell them' is exaggerated; 'many' is more natural. Use 'sell them at discounted prices' (correct preposition). 'It's so popular within children' is incorrect: use 'they are so popular with children.' 'They force their parents to buy themselves a bike' has wrong reflexive pronoun and reference; children 'pressure their parents to buy them a bike.' 'Grow up and in need of a bias' contains wrong tense/phrase and misspelling ('bias' instead of 'bike'). Use 'grow and need one.' Suggestion: Maintain pronoun clarity by matching plural/singular ('children' -> 'they' or repeat 'children'); use correct prepositions ('popular with', 'sell at'); avoid reflexive pronoun when not appropriate; correct spelling 'bike.'