Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is clear and relevant, but it is a little long and contains some small grammar and cohesion issues. Make the response more concise, split into a clear topic sentence and one or two supporting details, and correct tense/word choices (e.g., say “a scooter” instead of “a scooty,” and use present perfect or simple past consistently). Use a linking phrase when adding the detail about your eighteenth birthday.

예시: Yes, I had a bicycle when I was a child. However, when I turned 18 my father gave me a scooter, which became my main way to get around at that time.

제안: The idea is relevant, but the answer has grammatical errors, repetition and informal fillers (e.g., “like”), and the argument could be more specific. Start with a clear topic sentence, use linking words to explain reasons and consequences, avoid fillers, and give a specific example or brief statistic if possible. Also use plural agreement (“bikes are popular”) and rephrase the negative consequence more formally.

예시: Yes, bikes are very popular in my country. In fact, the number of motorcycles and scooters has risen in recent years, which has contributed to heavier traffic in cities and increased air pollution, especially during rush hour.

× Yes, I used to have a bicycle when I was very young and when I turned 18 my father gifted me a scooty and that was my only mode of transportation that time.

✓ Yes, I used to have a bicycle when I was very young, and when I turned 18 my father gifted me a scooty, which was my only mode of transportation at that time.

The original sentence has minor tense and phrasing issues. 'That was my only mode of transportation that time' is awkward; 'which was my only mode of transportation at that time' is correct and keeps past-tense consistency. Also adding a comma before 'and' improves readability. Suggestion: keep past verbs consistent ('used to have', 'turned', 'gifted') and use 'at that time' for referring to a past period.

× Certainly it's very popular in my country and on top of it, I think that the number of bikes are increasing day by day and because of which like there is way too much traffic and this is not good for the society.

✓ Certainly it's very popular in my country, and I think that the number of bikes is increasing day by day, which is causing a lot of traffic and is not good for society.

The phrase 'the number of bikes are increasing' has a subject-verb agreement error: 'the number' is singular and requires 'is'. Also the original uses informal fillers ('on top of it', 'like', 'because of which') and awkward phrasing. Replacing with 'which is causing' clarifies cause and effect and keeping verbs singular ('is increasing', 'is causing', 'is not') maintains agreement. Suggestion: use 'the number of + plural noun' with singular verbs, avoid fillers, and use clear causal connectors like 'which is causing'.