Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Reduce repetition, correct small grammar mistakes, and make the sequence clear. Start with a direct topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct the phrase “writing a real bike” to “riding a two-wheeled bike.”

예시: Yes, I had a bike when I was a child. My parents bought me a pink training-wheel bike, which felt very safe and helped me gain confidence. As a result, I learned to balance and later transitioned to a two-wheeled bike within a few months.

제안: Make the answer more concise and add clearer supporting reasons with linking words. Use precise vocabulary (e.g., affordable, convenient, parking). Avoid unnecessary clauses like “which is China” unless relevant. Provide one or two specific examples or comparisons.

예시: Yes, bikes are very popular in China. In particular, students often ride them because they are affordable and convenient for short trips; moreover, bike parking is widely available at schools and markets, so many people prefer them for daily commuting.

× My mom and my mom and dad bought it for me and it was a pink bike with four wheels.

✓ My mom and dad bought it for me, and it was a pink bike with training wheels.

The original sentence repeats 'my mom' (duplication) which is a structural error (Sentence structure/word duplication). Also 'four wheels' is technically correct but sounds odd for a child's bike; 'training wheels' is the natural plural noun. Suggestion: remove the repeated phrase so the subject is correct and use the common term 'training wheels' to describe extra wheels for stability. Note: This suggestion addresses the singular/plural and duplication by correcting the noun phrase to a natural plural noun.

× So it's really safe and it helped me to build the confidence in writing a real bike with.

✓ So it was really safe, and it helped me build the confidence to ride a real bike.

Errors include tense mismatch ('it's' present vs earlier past 'had'/'was'), incorrect verb phrase 'to build the confidence in writing' (wrong verb and preposition), and awkward 'with' at the end. Corrected to past tense 'it was' to match context, use 'helped me build the confidence' (no 'to' before 'build' is optional but common without 'to' after 'helped'), and change 'writing' to 'ride' which is the intended verb. Also use 'to ride a real bike' as the correct infinitive phrase.

× Yes, I think they are very popular in my country, which is China, so people will buy bikes, especially the students, because the bikes are really cheap and convenient and easy to get a park.

✓ Yes, I think they are very popular in my country, China, so people buy bikes, especially students, because bikes are very cheap, convenient, and easy to park.

Several issues: tense and modal usage ('will buy' implies future but the general statement should be present simple 'buy'), article and noun use ('the students' and 'the bikes' are unnecessary; use general plural 'students' and 'bikes'), incorrect phrase 'easy to get a park' (wrong verb and noun order) should be 'easy to park'. Also simplify apposition 'which is China' to 'China'. Suggestions: use present simple for general facts, omit unnecessary definite articles when speaking generally, and use the correct verb 'park' with 'easy to'.