Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve coherence and fluency: give a clear topic sentence, avoid hesitations and fragmented sentences, and combine short fragments using linking words. Add one or two specific supporting details (who gave it, where you learned, a brief feeling). Keep answer under five sentences.

예시: Yes — I got a pink bike for my tenth birthday, and at first I couldn’t ride it without help. However, my older brother taught me in the park the next day, and after a few hours of practice I could ride confidently. I remember feeling very proud when I rode it home on my own.

제안: Make your opinion explicit and support it with specific reasons and examples. Use linking words (however, although, for example) to contrast adult and child usage, and avoid trailing off. Provide one concise prediction or example to enrich content.

예시: I wouldn’t say bikes are generally popular among adults in my country because most people prefer cars or public transport. However, cycling is common among children and students — for example, many schoolchildren ride small bikes to school. I think this is because parents often consider cars safer for longer trips.

× Yes, I had when I was 10 years old, uh, on my birthday I got a pink bike and for the first time I couldn't. To kinda use it. But then over time I did great.

✓ Yes, I had one when I was 10 years old. On my birthday I got a pink bike and at first I couldn't really use it, but over time I got better.

Multiple issues: missing object after 'had' (singular/plural), awkward sentence fragments, and incorrect tense/aspect usage. Correction supplies the missing object 'one', combines fragments into complete sentences, replaces 'for the first time I couldn't' with 'at first I couldn't really use it' to show initial inability, and 'I did great' becomes 'I got better' which is a natural past development. Suggestion: always include the object of 'had', avoid sentence fragments, use 'at first' for initial situations and 'got better' or 'improved' to describe gradual improvement.

× I wouldn't say so because in my country people usually tend to use car or public transportations rather than ride a bike.

✓ I wouldn't say so because in my country people usually tend to use cars or public transport rather than riding a bike.

Errors: incorrect quantifier/number agreement ('car' should be plural 'cars'), incorrect plural form 'transportations' (uncountable 'transport' is correct), and verb form after 'rather than' should be a gerund when contrasting actions. Correction makes nouns plural where needed and uses 'riding' after 'rather than'. Suggestion: use plural nouns for general statements (cars), use 'transport' not 'transportations', and use consistent verb forms after 'rather than' (prefer gerund).

× But uh, it's popular among the children. We have a lot of little.

✓ But it's popular among children. We have a lot of little ones.

Problems: unnecessary definite article 'the' before 'children' when speaking generally, and an incomplete sentence 'a lot of little.' requires a noun ('ones') to refer back to 'children'. Correction removes 'the' for a general statement and completes the fragment with 'ones'. Suggestion: omit 'the' when making generalizations (popular among children) and use 'little ones' to refer to small children instead of leaving the noun out.