Bike— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Reduce hesitations and repetition, give a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Keep it concise (no more than 4–5 sentences). Focus on vivid specifics (age, exact location, frequency) and avoid filler words like “umm” and repeated phrases.

예시: Yes, I did. My father bought me a small red bike from a shop near our house when I was seven. I practised cycling around our courtyard every afternoon, and sometimes my parents would take me to the nearby park so I could learn faster.

제안: Provide a direct opinion then support it with two clear, specific reasons and use linking words (for example, because, moreover). Avoid vague phrases and hesitations. Use accurate vocabulary (e.g., "commute to work" instead of "their companies") and correct singular/plural and article usage.

예시: Yes, bikes are quite popular in my country. Many people commute to work by bike because it is cheap and convenient, and it’s also environmentally friendly since it produces no carbon emissions. Moreover, cycling helps people stay fit, so cities are encouraging bike lanes.

× Yes I did umm, my father bought me a small bike umm, at the shop near my house umm, and every day I practiced how to cycle around my house or sometime my parents took me to the park uh, which is very close to my house to umm, learn how to how to.

✓ Yes, I did. My father bought me a small bike at the shop near my house, and every day I practiced cycling around my house. Sometimes my parents took me to the park, which is very close to my house, to learn.

Multiple past-tense verbs are correct (did, bought, practiced, took) but the sentence is run-on and contains word choice errors. 'Practiced how to cycle' is better as 'practiced cycling.' 'Sometime' should be 'sometimes.' Ending phrase 'to learn how to how to' is redundant; use 'to learn.' Suggestions: split into shorter sentences, use 'practiced cycling,' correct 'sometime' to 'sometimes,' and remove duplicated words.

× Yes uh, bikes are considered a popular kinds of transport in my country.

✓ Yes, bikes are considered a popular kind of transport in my country.

Mismatch between singular and plural: 'a' with singular 'kind' but 'kinds' was used. Use 'a popular kind' or 'popular kinds' without 'a.' Also 'transport' as an uncountable noun is acceptable; alternatively 'means of transport' could be used. Suggestion: choose consistent singular/plural form.

× Some people cycle every day to, uh, their companies.

✓ Some people cycle to their workplaces every day.

Word order and word choice: 'to their companies' is unnatural; use 'to their workplaces' or 'to work.' Place frequency adverb 'every day' at end or after verb. Suggestion: use 'cycle to work every day' or 'cycle to their workplaces every day.'

× Umm, and I think this is one of the best way to protect the planets because, uh, it doesn't release the carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, so it should be.

✓ I think this is one of the best ways to protect the planet because it does not release carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, so it should be encouraged.

Multiple errors: 'one of the best way' should be 'one of the best ways' (article/number agreement). 'Planets' should be singular 'planet' when speaking generally. 'The carbon dioxide' is unnecessary; use 'carbon dioxide' uncountable. Final phrase 'so it should be' is incomplete—add 'be encouraged' or similar. Suggestion: use plural 'ways,' singular 'planet,' omit 'the' before 'carbon dioxide,' and complete the clause.