Study— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Make the answer more concise and avoid repetition. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific details (course and year). Use linking words only if adding extra detail.

예시: I’m currently a fourth-year tourism student at university. I’m not working at the moment because I’m focusing on finishing my degree and practical training.

제안: Be direct and avoid unclear phrases. Provide the university name, location, and one clear fact. Omit filler such as 'I will give you a fun fact sign' and correct grammar (e.g., 'the Philippines').

예시: I study at Central Ozone State University in Science City of Muñoz. Interestingly, Muñoz is known as the leading science city in the Philippines because of its agricultural research centers.

제안: Give a clear topic sentence and then support it with specific reasons. Fix grammar and sentence structure, use linking words like 'especially' or 'however' correctly, and avoid redundancy.

예시: Yes, it’s a very good place to study, especially for fields like agriculture, veterinary medicine, and education because the university has strong research facilities. However, even for tourism management, the faculty and resources still offer a good quality education.

제안: This answer does not directly address changes you would like. First, state whether you would like changes, then give one or two specific changes (facilities, courses, student services). Avoid unclear references (e.g., 'CLS') and repeated words.

예시: Yes, I would like some changes. For example, I’d improve student housing and provide more internship placements with tourism companies so students can gain practical experience while studying.

제안: Start with a clear statement about your plans, then explain reasons and a brief detail about the chosen program. Avoid vague phrases like 'something came on my mind' and be specific about the intended degree and motivation.

예시: I plan to pursue a master’s degree in education at the University of the Philippines because I want to become a lecturer. Although people expect tourism graduates to become flight attendants, I’m more interested in teaching and academic research.

× No, I am not working yet.

✓ No, I am not working yet.

The sentence is grammatically correct but keep as present continuous to indicate a temporary state; no change needed.

× I am currently studying at our university here where I am currently a fourth year tourism student.

✓ I am currently studying at our university here, where I am a fourth-year tourism student.

Use simple present continuous 'am studying' is correct; remove repeated 'currently' to avoid redundancy and hyphenate 'fourth-year' as a compound adjective before the noun.

× I am currently studying at Central Ozone State University which is located at Science City of Munoz.

✓ I am currently studying at Central Ozone State University, which is located in Science City of Muñoz.

Use 'in' for locations such as cities; add a comma before the nonrestrictive clause and correct spelling/diacritics if applicable for proper noun.

× Actually I will give you a fun fact sign.

✓ Actually, I'll give you a fun fact.

'Give you a fun fact' is the correct collocation; 'sign' is unnecessary and unclear. Use contraction 'I'll' for natural spoken style and add comma after 'Actually'.

× City of Munoz is a number one city on the Philippines to be a science city.

✓ The City of Muñoz is the number-one city in the Philippines to be designated a science city.

Use the definite article 'the' for a specific city name used like a title, hyphenate 'number-one', use 'in the Philippines', and use 'designated' or 'to be designated' for clarity.

× Yes, it is a good place to study, especially if your specialization is in agriculture, veterinary medicine and education.

✓ Yes, it is a good place to study, especially if your specialization is in agriculture, veterinary medicine, or education.

List items should use commas and the coordinating conjunction 'or' before the last item when referring to alternatives; add comma after 'veterinary medicine'.

× But even though my program is tourism management is they still provide the quality education that their vision.

✓ But even though my program is tourism management, they still provide the quality education that reflects their vision.

Remove the extra 'is' after 'management'; ensure subject-verb agreement with 'they provide'; use 'reflects' or 'that reflects their vision' to make the clause coherent.

× Yes, actually CLS, you helped me grow and make me change as a person or as a student because it makes me more knowledgeable and gives me peace while studying far away away from my hometown.

✓ Yes, actually CLS has helped me grow and change as a person and as a student, because it has made me more knowledgeable and given me peace while studying far away from my hometown.

Use present perfect 'has helped' to indicate experience up to now; 'make me change' -> 'change' or 'has made me change'; avoid repetition 'away away'; use parallel structure 'grow and change'; change 'it makes me' to 'it has made me' and use past participle 'given me peace' for correct verb forms.

× Since I am a tourism student, a lot of people are expecting me to be a flight attendant.

✓ Since I am a tourism student, a lot of people expect me to become a flight attendant.

Use simple present 'expect' for general statements rather than present continuous 'are expecting'; 'become' or 'be' is acceptable—'become a flight attendant' sounds natural.

× But something came on my mind like I want to pursue education.

✓ But something came to my mind: I want to pursue a career in education.

Use 'came to my mind' rather than 'came on my mind'; specify 'a career in education' or 'further studies in education' for clarity; use a colon to introduce the thought.

× I want to enroll on my master in University of the Philippines.

✓ I want to enroll in a master's program at the University of the Philippines.

Use 'enroll in' (not 'on') and say 'a master's program' or 'for my master's' and use 'at the University of the Philippines'; include the article before the university name if used with 'at'.