Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: คำตอบตอบตรงคำถามและมีรายละเอียดที่เฉพาะเจาะจง เช่น บัลเลต์ การว่ายน้ำ และอายุสิบขวบ อย่างไรก็ตาม ควรใช้คำนามพหูพจน์ให้ถูกต้อง เช่น “some opportunities” และใช้ tense ให้สอดคล้องกับอดีต เช่น “I liked” และ “I wanted” แทน “I like” และ “I want” นอกจากนี้ วลี “learn about the swimming and performance at a sport” ไม่เป็นธรรมชาติ ควรอธิบายเหตุผลให้ชัดเจนและใช้ linking word เช่น “because” หรือ “also” เพื่อเชื่อมรายละเอียด ควรลดความซ้ำซ้อนและแบ่งคำตอบเป็น 2–3 ประโยคที่ฟังเป็นธรรมชาติ

예시: Yes, I had several opportunities to try new activities as a child. When I was about ten, I joined a ballet club and took swimming lessons. I enjoyed dancing, and I wanted to become more confident in the water. These activities also helped me stay active and make new friends.

제안: คำตอบแสดงความเห็นว่าไม่เห็นด้วย แต่เหตุผลยังไม่ชัดเจนและมีข้อผิดพลาดด้านไวยากรณ์และการเลือกคำจำนวนมาก เช่น “try a fail thing,” “everybody has a limit” และ “forecast at anything” ทำให้ผู้ฟังเข้าใจได้ยาก ควรเริ่มด้วย topic sentence ที่ชัดเจน เช่น “No, I don’t think people need to try everything.” จากนั้นให้เหตุผลหนึ่งหรือสองข้อโดยใช้ linking words เช่น “because,” “for example” และ “as a result” ควรอธิบายว่าการเลือกกิจกรรมที่เหมาะกับความสนใจและเวลาอาจมีประสิทธิภาพมากกว่าการลองทุกอย่าง และควรจำกัดคำตอบไว้ประมาณ 3–4 ประโยค

예시: No, I don’t think people need to try as many different things as possible. Everyone has limited time and energy, so it is better to focus on activities that match their interests and goals. For example, someone who loves music might benefit more from practising an instrument regularly than from trying many unrelated hobbies. However, trying a few new things can still help people discover their interests.

× Yes, I had some opportunity to try new activities as a child.

✓ Yes, I had some opportunities to try new activities as a child.

The plural noun opportunities is more appropriate because the student refers to several chances to try different activities. Use a plural noun after some when referring to multiple countable items.

× I joined a ballet club and swimming classes when I was about ten because I like to dance and I want to learn about the swimming and performance at a sport.

✓ I joined a ballet club and swimming classes when I was about ten because I liked dancing and wanted to learn about swimming and performing in sports.

The question asks about childhood, so the past tense should be used consistently: liked and wanted. The present forms like and want should change to their past forms.

× I joined a ballet club and swimming classes when I was about ten because I like to dance and I want to learn about the swimming and performance at a sport.

✓ I joined a ballet club and swimming classes when I was about ten because I liked dancing and wanted to learn about swimming and performing in sports.

Swimming is used as a general activity, so it does not need the definite article the. We normally say learn about swimming, not learn about the swimming, when discussing the activity in general.

× I joined a ballet club and swimming classes when I was about ten because I like to dance and I want to learn about the swimming and performance at a sport.

✓ I joined a ballet club and swimming classes when I was about ten because I liked dancing and wanted to learn about swimming and performing in sports.

The preposition at is not suitable in this context. The expression performing in sports is more natural when describing participation or performance in sporting activities.

× No, I think people should try a fail thing better everybody has a limit.

✓ No, I think people should try a few things because everybody has limits.

A few is the correct quantifier for a small number of countable things. A fail thing is not a valid English expression. Also, people generally have limits, so the plural noun limits is more natural here.

× No, I think people should try a fail thing better everybody has a limit.

✓ No, I think people should try a few things because everybody has limits.

The original sentence contains two ideas without a suitable conjunction. Use because to connect the opinion with its reason: people should try a few things because everybody has limits.

× If we forecast at anything the reversal that we get it a not better for yourself

✓ If we focus on everything, the result we get will not be better for us.

The correct preposition after focus is on. The phrase focus on everything means consider or concentrate on all things.

× If we forecast at anything the reversal that we get it a not better for yourself

✓ If we focus on everything, the result we get will not be better for us.

The sentence describes a possible result in the future. In a first conditional sentence, use will plus the base verb in the result clause: will not be better.

× If we forecast at anything the reversal that we get it a not better for yourself

✓ If we focus on everything, the result we get will not be better for us.

The subject is we, so the corresponding object pronoun should be us, not yourself. Yourself is a singular reflexive pronoun used when you is the subject.