Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Answer the question directly by saying whether you had such opportunities. Use correct past-tense forms because you are describing childhood: “were offered,” “became,” and “was given.” Avoid unclear phrases such as “go to confidence” and “the new activities was giving to me educated.” Give one or two specific examples, such as playing a sport or joining a speech contest, and explain briefly how your parents encouraged you. Use linking words such as “for example” and “as a result” to make the answer clearer.

예시: Yes, I had several opportunities to try new activities as a child. For example, my parents encouraged me to play basketball and take part in school speech contests. At first, I felt shy, but their support helped me become more confident. As a result, I became more willing to try unfamiliar things.

제안: State your opinion clearly at the beginning, for example, “Yes, I think people should try different things.” Then support it with one or two specific reasons. Avoid repeating “the people,” “all the things,” and “get knowledge”; use natural phrases such as “learn about the world,” “develop new skills,” and “discover their interests.” Clarify the final idea: people should make the most of opportunities when they have them. Use a linking word such as “however” to acknowledge that people should not try activities that are unsafe or completely unsuitable for them.

예시: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities, especially when they are young. This can help them discover their interests, develop useful skills, and learn more about the world. For example, someone who tries music, sports, and volunteering may find a talent or career interest they did not know they had. However, they should choose activities that are safe and manageable rather than trying everything without a clear purpose.

× the new activities was giving to me

✓ the new activities were given to me

The noun activities is plural, so it requires the plural auxiliary verb were, not was. The past participle given is also needed in this passive structure.

× then later I can get motivated

✓ then later I became motivated

The question asks about your childhood, so the answer should mainly use the past tense. Use became instead of can get to describe a past change in motivation.

× the new activities was giving to me educated by my parents

✓ new activities were introduced to me and taught by my parents

In a passive structure, use a past participle after were. Given, introduced, and taught are past participles. Giving is a present participle and is incorrect here.

× go to confidence to get a opportunity to the part take part in the new activities

✓ gain confidence and have an opportunity to take part in new activities

The natural expressions are gain confidence and take part in. The preposition to is not used before confidence in this expression, and the phrase to the part take part is incorrectly formed.

× take part in the new activities like the some sports

✓ take part in new activities, such as some sports

The definite article the is unnecessary when talking about activities in general. It should also not be used before some.

× get a opportunity

✓ have an opportunity

Opportunity begins with a vowel sound, so it requires the article an, not a. The expression have an opportunity is also more natural in this context.

× Well, when the new activities was giving to me educated by my parents, then later I can get motivated and go to confidence to get a opportunity to the part take part in the new activities like the some sports or some speeches which was given by.

✓ Well, when new activities were introduced to me and taught by my parents, I became motivated and gained the confidence to take part in activities such as sports and public speaking.

The original sentence contains several clauses joined in an unclear and incomplete way. The corrected version uses a clear time clause followed by a complete main clause. It also removes the unfinished phrase which was given by.

× It was a trusting question.

✓ It was an interesting question.

Trusting usually describes a person who believes other people. Interesting is the appropriate adjective for describing a question that makes someone think.

× The peoples can try the all the different things

✓ People can try all the different things

People is already the plural form of person, so peoples is incorrect in this general context. The phrase all the different things is also correctly formed without an extra the before all.

× get a knowledge about the what was going in their world

✓ gain knowledge about what is happening in the world

Knowledge is generally an uncountable noun, so it does not normally take the article a. The article the is not needed before the clause what is happening.

× what was going in their world or some countries

✓ what is happening in the world and in other countries

This answer gives a general reason that is true in the present, so use the present tense is happening rather than the past form was going. The expression what is happening is also grammatically complete.

× The peoples can try the all the different things

✓ People should try as many different things as they can

The question asks whether people should try different things, so should is the appropriate modal verb for giving advice or expressing recommendation. The phrase as many different things as they can directly matches the wording of the question.

× get a knowledge about the what was going in their world or some countries

✓ gain some knowledge about what is happening in their country and in other countries

Knowledge is uncountable, so use some knowledge rather than a knowledge. The phrase other countries is clearer and more natural when making a comparison with the speaker's own country.

× And the peoples can't get opportunity, Sir, to do things, Sir.

✓ There are also opportunities for people to try different things.

When stating that opportunities exist, use the there are structure because opportunities is plural. The original sentence does not clearly express existence and also needs the plural form opportunities.

× Well, it was a trusting question. The peoples can try the all the different things because they can get to know about the all the things in the world and get a knowledge about the what was going in their world or some countries. And the peoples can't get opportunity, Sir, to do things, Sir.

✓ People should try as many different things as they can because this helps them learn about the world and other countries, gain knowledge, and find opportunities to try new activities.

The original response contains repeated words, incomplete phrases, and unclear connections between ideas. The corrected version combines the related ideas into a clear sentence with because and a parallel list of benefits.