Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Good natural response with clear preference and reasons. To improve, make the answer more concise and add one specific detail (e.g., age or setting) using a linking phrase to enhance coherence. Also avoid repeating simple adjectives and vary vocabulary.

예시: Yes. When I was about eight I tried baseball for a few lessons at school, but I struggled to hit and catch reliably, so I switched to soccer. Because of that, I enjoyed the continuous movement and team coordination in soccer, which felt much more natural for me.

제안: Good opinion with positive reasons, but the answer runs together and lacks linking punctuation and a supporting specific example. Improve coherence by using linking words and a brief example to illustrate the point. Keep it to two or three sentences maximum.

예시: Absolutely. Trying different activities opens up new opportunities and keeps your mind active; for example, taking a cooking class helped a friend discover a career in hospitality, which she never expected.

× Absolutely, trying different things allows you to unlock new opportunities and on top of that it keeps your brain active learning new things can also be very enjoyable.

✓ Absolutely, trying different things allows you to unlock new opportunities, and on top of that it keeps your brain active. Learning new things can also be very enjoyable.

The original is a run-on sentence combining multiple independent clauses without proper punctuation or conjunction use, which is a sentence structure error (ID 26). Split into two sentences and add a comma before the coordinating conjunction 'and' to join the first two clauses correctly. Then separate the final clause into a new sentence to improve clarity: 'Learning new things can also be very enjoyable.' This prevents comma splice/run-on issues and makes the ideas distinct and easier to follow.