Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Câu trả lời của bạn có ý tưởng rõ ràng nhưng cần chính xác và mạch lạc hơn. Hạn chế lỗi ngữ pháp và câu bị cắt, sửa cụm từ không phù hợp (ví dụ “piano lesson in Jonah speaking English conversation” không rõ nghĩa). Nên bắt đầu bằng một câu chủ đề trực tiếp, rồi thêm 1–2 chi tiết cụ thể (thời gian, tần suất, cảm nhận) dùng liên từ để nối ý. Giữ tối đa 3–4 câu để tự nhiên và hiệu quả.

예시: Yes, I had many opportunities as a child because my parents always encouraged me to try new things. For example, I learned to play the piano from the age of seven and attended weekly lessons for three years, which helped me develop discipline and confidence. I also joined an English conversation club once a week to improve my speaking skills.

제안: Ý tưởng tốt và trả lời trực tiếp nhưng cần câu mở chủ đề mạnh mẽ hơn và ví dụ cụ thể. Tránh lặp từ ("different things" nhiều lần) và dùng liên từ để làm rõ quan hệ lý do-kết quả. Thêm một ví dụ ngắn hoặc kết quả cụ thể để làm câu trả lời thuyết phục hơn. Giữ 2–3 câu ngắn gọn, mạch lạc.

예시: Yes, people should try a variety of activities because new experiences broaden their skills and perspectives. For instance, learning basic coding or public speaking can improve problem-solving and communication, which are useful in many careers. As a result, trying different things often makes you more adaptable and competitive.

× I had many opportunities because my parents encouraged me to try different activities. For example, I took piano lesson in Jonah speaking English conversation, so I could learn more

✓ I had many opportunities because my parents encouraged me to try different activities. For example, I took piano lessons and attended English conversation classes, so I could learn more.

The original sentence has awkward phrasing and singular/plural errors: 'piano lesson' should be plural 'piano lessons' (Singular and plural issue), and 'in Jonah speaking English conversation' is unclear and likely incorrect preposition and noun choices. I corrected to 'attended English conversation classes' to fit past tense and make the meaning clear. Keep verbs in past tense to match 'had' and 'encouraged'. Use plural nouns when referring to repeated lessons and use common collocations ('attend classes').

× Of course, in my opinion people should try as many different things as they can because they can have more experience and knowledge from another field. So this can support them in main fields.

✓ Of course, in my opinion people should try as many different things as they can because they can gain more experience and knowledge from other fields. This can support them in their main fields.

Problems include word choice and pronoun/possessive issues. 'Have more experience' is acceptable but 'gain more experience' is more natural. 'From another field' is singular and vague; use 'other fields' to match 'many different things'. 'So this can support them in main fields' lacks a possessive and article: change to 'support them in their main fields'. The modal 'should' is correct, so I kept it; adjustments focus on noun plurality, preposition use, and possessive pronoun for clarity.