Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve grammatical accuracy and clarity, organize into a clear topic sentence plus supporting details, use correct verb forms and articles, and avoid redundancy. Keep response natural and within 3–5 sentences. Add specific details (names, ages, frequency) and link ideas with simple connectors (for example, “also” or “besides”).

예시: Yes, I had several opportunities. For example, my father often took me to dance classes when I was eight, which I had never tried before, and I attended a weekly history workshop at school where we learned about different places and people. These activities helped me become more confident and curious about new subjects.

제안: Make the opinion direct and concise, use accurate vocabulary (e.g., “gain” instead of “catch”), and provide a clear reason and a brief example. Use linking words like “because” and “for example” to make the argument coherent. Limit to 2–4 sentences to sound natural.

예시: Yes, I believe people should try many different activities because they can gain new skills and knowledge that are useful later. For example, learning teamwork in sports can help in a future job, and trying public speaking can build confidence.

× Yes, I had as a child.

✓ Yes, I did as a child.

The student used 'had' incorrectly to answer a yes/no question about past experience. In English, do-support is required for short answers: use 'did' for past simple. Suggestion: use 'did' when replying to 'Did you...?' or rephrase to 'Yes, I did have that as a child.'

× My father often took me to college and dancing's class which I had ever tried before.

✓ My father often took me to the college and to dancing classes I had never tried before.

Several issues: 'dancing's class' is incorrect: use 'dancing class' or 'dance classes'; plural 'classes' fits context. 'the college' may require 'the' if referring to a specific place; adding 'to' before 'dancing classes' improves parallel structure. 'had ever tried before' is incorrect in negative sense; use 'had never tried before.' Suggestion: use 'never' with past perfect or simple past as appropriate: 'I had never tried before' or 'I had not tried before.'

× I also attended history workshop at school when I learn about different places and people and don't experience many more.

✓ I also attended a history workshop at school where I learned about different places and people, and did not have many other experiences.

Missing article before 'history workshop' requires 'a'. 'When I learn' should be past tense 'where I learned' to match past context. 'don't experience many more' is ungrammatical: use past negative 'did not have many other experiences.' Also 'when' is better replaced by 'where' or rephrase. Suggestion: maintain consistent past tense and include appropriate articles.

× Yes, I could believe people should try out many different things as they can because if they catch other things, they are able to learn about the ability or knowledge and they can use these kind of knowledge for the future, so I believe.

✓ Yes, I believe people should try out as many different things as they can because by trying other things they can learn new skills or knowledge, and they can use this kind of knowledge in the future.

'Could believe' is incorrect modal choice; simple present 'believe' is appropriate for stating an opinion. 'As many different things as they can' is the correct phrase. 'If they catch other things' is incorrect verb choice; use 'by trying' or 'if they try'. 'Learn about the ability or knowledge' is awkward; use 'learn new skills or knowledge.' 'These kind of knowledge' has agreement errors: use 'this kind of knowledge' or 'this type of knowledge' or plural 'these kinds of knowledge/skills.' Also change 'for the future' to 'in the future.' Suggestion: use clear modals, correct collocations ('try out', 'learn new skills'), and consistent article/noun agreement.