Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve grammar and clarity: start with a clear topic sentence, correct verb forms, and concise supporting details. Use linking words (for example, 'also' or 'and') and give one specific example. Keep to no more than 3–4 sentences. Focus on accurate noun phrases (e.g., 'piano lessons' not 'playing piano gorge').

예시: When I was a child, I had the opportunity to take piano lessons and play soccer with private tutors. These activities helped me learn new skills and meet other children. For example, practicing piano taught me discipline, and playing soccer helped me make close friends.

제안: Provide a direct opinion first, then support with clear reasons and one concise example. Correct vocabulary (e.g., 'outdoors' not 'Odoor') and grammar (use 'should' or 'I think' and plural/singular agreement). Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example' to connect ideas.

예시: Yes, I think people should try many different activities because it helps them discover interests and meet others. For example, joining outdoor sports like running or football builds teamwork and often leads to lasting friendships.

× When I was a child I had playing piano gorge and even soccer with the private tutors.

✓ When I was a child I played the piano and even played soccer with private tutors.

Original sentence uses incorrect verb form 'had playing' (incorrect auxiliary and gerund) and a wrong noun 'gorge'. Use simple past 'played' for completed actions in childhood. 'the piano' is the correct collocation; omit 'the' before 'private tutors' only if speaking in general, but 'with private tutors' is fine. Suggestion: use 'I played' for past habits and avoid unnecessary auxiliaries. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× It was the best way can can get close to other people so as I remember now it was very memorable things as I'm thinking now

✓ It was the best way to get close to other people, so I remember it as a very memorable time.

Errors: 'can can' is a duplicated modal; 'the best way can get' mixes modal with infinitive incorrectly. Use 'the best way to get' (infinitive). 'so as I remember now' is awkward — use 'so I remember it' and 'very memorable things' should be singular 'a very memorable time' to match reference to an experience. Keep past tense consistent for recollection. Suggestion: simplify clauses and keep verbs in correct forms. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× We live in our whole life.

✓ We live our whole lives.

Original phrase 'We live in our whole life' has incorrect preposition and number agreement. Use no preposition: 'live our whole lives' (plural 'lives' because 'we'). This expresses the intended meaning that during our lifetime we should do things. Suggestion: drop 'in' and pluralize 'life' when subject is plural. Grammar problem type ID: 26

× We can get close to each other when we try to do more activities in Odoor, especially for athletics is the best way to make good friendship and even good relationship with other people.

✓ We can get closer to each other when we try more outdoor activities; especially athletics is a great way to build friendships and good relationships with other people.

Problems: 'in Odoor' is a misspelling/incorrect preposition — should be 'outdoor' (adjective) modifying 'activities'; use 'try more outdoor activities' (no 'do'). 'get close' better as comparative 'get closer'. 'for athletics is the best way' is ungrammatical; rephrase to 'especially athletics is a great way' or 'especially doing athletics'. Use plural 'friendships' and 'relationships' for generality. Suggestion: use correct adjective 'outdoor', comparative 'closer', and clearer noun forms. Grammar problem type ID: 11

× especially for athletics is the best way to make good friendship and even good relationship with other people.

✓ especially athletics is the best way to form strong friendships and good relationships with other people.

Original uses 'for athletics is the best way' (awkward structure) and 'good friendship' (count noun needs plural or modifier). Use 'form strong friendships' and plural 'relationships' for general actions. Also prefer 'form' or 'build' rather than 'make' for more natural collocations. Suggestion: restructure sentence to place subject 'athletics' before the verb and pluralize nouns. Grammar problem type ID: 13