Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be concise and use a clear sentence structure: start with a topic sentence answering the question, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Correct grammar (articles, verb forms) and avoid repetition ("school's schools"). Also finish your thought — the answer currently trails off.

예시: Yes. I joined my school’s football team when I was a child and we competed in the annual school tournament. As a result, our team trained twice a week for three months, which helped us improve teamwork and eventually win the trophy.

제안: Give a direct opinion sentence, then add one or two specific reasons with linking words. Keep sentences shorter and avoid vague phrases like "all different things" or trailing off. Use precise examples and correct grammar to sound natural.

예시: Yes, I think people should try many different things because new experiences help you learn and grow. For example, traveling to a new city taught me how to adapt to different cultures, and trying new hobbies like painting helped me discover talents I didn’t know I had.

× I once took part in a football activity I was enrolled as the member of my school's schools football team and we played the school tournament and even won the.

✓ I once took part in a football activity. I was enrolled as a member of my school's football team, and we played in the school tournament and even won.

The original run-on sentence combines several clauses without proper punctuation or connectors, and contains repetition ('school's schools') and an article error ('the member'). Break the sentence into two or more sentences or use commas and conjunctions correctly. Use 'a member' (article) and 'school's football team' (remove redundant 'schools'), and include the preposition 'in' before 'the school tournament'. Suggestion: separate ideas, correct articles, and add necessary prepositions.

× Yes, people should try everything they can in their life because we are here to experience all different things in this life we can like for example we need to travel to a new place to know its difference and.

✓ Yes, people should try as many different things as they can in life because we are here to experience new things. For example, we should travel to a new place to learn how it is different.

The original sentence is a long, run-on with repetition ('in this life', 'in life') and awkward phrasing ('know its difference'). It also ends abruptly with 'and.' Break into two sentences, use the quantifier phrase 'as many different things as they can', remove redundant words, and replace 'know its difference' with 'learn how it is different' or 'discover the differences.' Ensure clear sentence boundaries and concise phrasing.