Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more specific and concise. Start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two concrete details and a brief result or feeling. Avoid trailing off and filler words. Use linking words (for example, I went to... and also...). Keep the answer within 3–4 sentences.

예시: Yes. As a child I had many opportunities to try new activities. For example, I attended dance lessons twice a week and took badminton classes at my local sports club, which helped me become more coordinated and confident. I also went to summer camps where I tried hiking and team games, which improved my teamwork skills.

제안: Give a clear thesis and then support it with a specific reason and an example. Use linking words (for instance, however, because) to make the answer coherent and avoid repeating the same idea. Aim for 2–3 sentences that express your view and a concise reason.

예시: I think people should try different things, but within reason. Trying new activities is useful because it helps you discover strengths and build skills; for instance, a colleague who joined a public-speaking course gained confidence and a promotion. However, during busy life stages it may be better to focus on a few priorities.

× When I was a child, I had many opportunities to participate in.

✓ When I was a child, I had many opportunities to participate in activities.

The phrasal verb 'participate in' requires an object. The original sentence ends with the preposition 'in' with no noun, which is incomplete. Add a noun (e.g., 'activities') to complete the verb phrase and make the sentence grammatically correct. Also, this correction keeps the past-tense context appropriate.

× I used to go to dance classes and sports classes, especially to the badminton classes.

✓ I used to go to dance classes and sports classes, especially badminton classes.

The preposition 'to' is unnecessary before 'badminton classes' and makes the phrase awkward. When listing types of classes, use the noun phrase without 'to'. Removing the extra 'to' yields a more natural and grammatically correct expression.

× I used to go to the summer camps and uh.

✓ I used to go to summer camps, too.

'The summer camps' implies specific camps; general reference should be 'summer camps'. The filler 'uh' breaks the sentence. Replacing it with 'too' or leaving it out completes the thought and matches the parallel structure with the previous items.

× In my opinion, it depends on the person's choice.

✓ In my opinion, it depends on the person's choices.

If speaking generally about people, 'choice' as a singular can be acceptable but sounds less natural when referring to general behavior. Using the plural 'choices' aligns with 'people' and the broader context. Alternatively, keep 'a person's choice' if emphasizing an individual; both are grammatical, but 'choices' fits the contrast with 'some people' better.

× Also it depends on the stage of life you are in.

✓ Also, it depends on the stage of life a person is in.

The original mixes impersonal 'it' with the second-person 'you', which is inconsistent in a general statement. Replacing 'you' with 'a person' maintains impersonal construction and consistent pronoun use. Adding a comma after 'Also' improves readability.

× So yeah, it completely depends on the choice and mood of the person.

✓ So, it completely depends on a person's choices and mood.

'The choice' is too specific; use 'a person's choices' for generalization. Also using 'a person' matches earlier impersonal phrasing. Adding a comma after 'So' improves flow. This keeps the present-tense general statement appropriate for the question about what people should do.