Opportunities— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct grammatical errors; start with a clear topic sentence, use linking words for coherence, and provide one specific example with brief detail. Avoid filler phrases and repetition.

예시: Yes, I had many opportunities to try new activities at school. For example, we had weekly extracurricular sessions where I learned skating and badminton; I even joined a skating club for three months, which helped me improve my balance and confidence. Besides sports, I attended beginner language classes, such as Spanish, which sparked my interest in learning other cultures.

제안: Give a direct opinion sentence, fix unclear or incorrect phrases, and support your view with a concise reason and a brief example. Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example' correctly and avoid repetition.

예시: Yes, I think people should try a variety of activities because life is short and new experiences can open unexpected opportunities. For example, I took a basic coding course out of curiosity, and years later that skill helped me get a part-time job in college.

× Well, during my school life, I had several opportunities as we were.

✓ Well, during my school life, I had several opportunities.

The original sentence ends with 'as we were,' which is an incomplete and unclear clause, causing a sentence structure error (ID 26). Remove the fragment to make the sentence complete and clear. Suggestion: avoid leaving dangling clauses; if you meant to compare, complete the clause (for example, 'as we were encouraged').

× We used to have different sessions like badminton, skating.

✓ We used to have different activities like badminton and skating.

The phrase 'sessions like badminton, skating' is awkward but not strictly wrong; the intended meaning is better conveyed with 'activities' and 'and' between items. This relates to verb/noun choice and sentence clarity (closest match: ID 9). Suggestion: use parallel nouns and connect items with 'and' for lists.

× Even I learned skating during that time.

✓ I even learned how to skate during that time.

'Learned skating' is understandable but unidiomatic. Use 'learned how to skate' or 'learned skating' with improved word order: 'I even learned how to skate.' This corrects the verb + noun construction (ID 9). Suggestion: use 'learned how to + verb' for activities.

× Along with it there were other activities like learning new languages.

✓ Along with that, there were other activities like learning new languages.

Using 'it' is vague; 'that' refers back to the previous idea. Also add a comma after the introductory phrase. This is an incorrect/unclear pronoun/preposition reference (ID 11). Suggestion: use 'that' for reference and include punctuation for clarity.

× In my opinion, definitely a person should try different things, whatever they can during their life because it's just one life and you never know what there's a headphone for you.

✓ In my opinion, a person should definitely try different things whenever they can during their life because we only live once and you never know what opportunity is waiting for you.

Multiple problems: word order, awkward phrase 'whatever they can', incorrect metaphor 'headphone' instead of 'opportunity', and unclear tense/usage. This falls under modal verb usage (ID 4) because of 'should' placement and also sentence structure. Reorder to 'should definitely try' and replace idiom with 'you never know what opportunity is waiting for you.' Suggestion: place adverbs like 'definitely' after the subject and before the main verb; use common idioms ('live once', 'opportunity').

× Because sometimes we might learn one skill at one point of time, but it might work out for us in in a later life.

✓ Sometimes we might learn a skill at one point in time, and it might work out for us later in life.

Errors include unnecessary 'Because' at sentence start making a fragment, duplicate 'in', 'one skill' and 'one point of time' are wordy. This is a present-tense/general statement issue (ID 6). Remove 'Because' or connect to previous sentence, delete duplicate 'in', use 'a skill' and 'at one point in time' or simply 'at some point in time.' Suggestion: avoid starting with 'Because' unless linking clauses; keep phrasing concise.