Tiredness— Part 1 채점 보고서
대화
Part 1
시험관
Do you often feel tired?
수험생
Well, as a person who has two jobs, I feel exhausted on a daily basis. I start my day at around 5:00 in the morning and I call it a day only after 9:30 in the evening. So basically I work 12 hours a day. Though that's the main reason why I usually feel dehydrated and umm like.
시험관
When would you feel tired?
수험생
Personally, I would definitely feel burned out a lot when it is at the end of the month when I have to, uh, mark all the tests and then made reports and send it to the parents. So the workload made me feel a little bit overwhelmed. That's when I feel the most exhausted.
시험관
What do you do when you feel tired?
수험생
For most of the time I would choose to lie down and entertain myself using social media, watching short reels and clips on Tik Toks and YouTube. But sometimes I do prefer to go outside and uh, have a mini karaoke contest with my friends.
시험관
When you feel tired, do you still go out with your friends?
수험생
We would depend on how close I am to this person and how important this meeting will be. I will not force myself to spend the last strength and energy to to do social meetings, but I would love to relax with my friends and my close one.
평가
총점
Part 1
Do you often feel tired?
점수: 72.0제안: Bạn trả lời trực tiếp và đưa ra chi tiết cụ thể về lịch làm việc, nhưng có một số vấn đề về tính chính xác và cách diễn đạt. Từ 5 giờ sáng đến 9:30 tối là khoảng 16 tiếng rưỡi, không phải 12 tiếng, vì vậy hãy điều chỉnh một trong hai thông tin. “Dehydrated” không phù hợp với ý “mệt”; nên dùng “exhausted”, “drained” hoặc “worn out”. Ngoài ra, tránh kết thúc bằng “umm like” và dùng từ nối tự nhiên như “As a result”.
예시: Yes, I often feel tired because I have two jobs. I usually start work at around 5 a.m. and finish at about 9:30 p.m., so my days are extremely long. As a result, I often feel exhausted by the evening, although I try to get enough sleep.
When would you feel tired?
점수: 68.0제안: Bạn nêu đúng thời điểm và nguyên nhân, nhưng câu trả lời có nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp và lặp từ “when”. Hãy nói “at the end of the month” thay vì “when it is at the end of the month”, dùng thì hiện tại nhất quán: “mark tests, write reports and send them to parents”. “The workload makes me feel overwhelmed” phù hợp hơn khi nói về tình huống lặp lại. Có thể thêm một kết quả cụ thể để câu trả lời tự nhiên và mạch lạc hơn.
예시: I usually feel most tired at the end of the month. That is when I have to mark a large number of tests, write reports and send them to parents. As the workload builds up, I feel overwhelmed and often need a quiet evening to recover.
What do you do when you feel tired?
점수: 78.0제안: Bạn đưa ra hai cách giải quyết khá cụ thể và có sự đối lập rõ ràng với “But”. Tuy nhiên, “For most of the time” nên đổi thành “Most of the time”, “Tik Toks” nên viết là “TikTok”, và “entertain myself using social media” hơi gượng; hãy dùng “scroll through social media”. Vì câu hỏi hỏi về thói quen, nên dùng hiện tại đơn thay vì “would choose” và “do prefer”.
예시: Most of the time, I lie down and scroll through social media, especially TikTok and YouTube Shorts. It helps me switch off after a long day. However, if I still have some energy, I go out with my friends and sing karaoke, which usually helps me feel more relaxed.
When you feel tired, do you still go out with your friends?
점수: 65.0제안: Bạn đã cố gắng trả lời theo điều kiện, nhưng câu mở đầu chưa đúng ngữ pháp: dùng “It depends”, không dùng “We would depend”. “This person” và “this meeting” chưa tự nhiên trong ngữ cảnh nói chung; nên dùng “my friends” và “the occasion”. Cụm “spend the last strength and energy to do social meetings” cần đổi thành “use my last bit of energy to socialize”, còn “my close one” nên là “my close friends” hoặc “the people closest to me”.
예시: It depends on how tired I am and how important the occasion is. If I am completely exhausted, I usually stay home and rest instead of going out. However, I am happy to meet my close friends because spending time with them helps me relax.
문법
× Though that's the main reason why I usually feel dehydrated and umm like.
✓ That's the main reason why I usually feel dehydrated and, um, tired.
Though introduces a subordinate clause and normally needs a main clause to complete the sentence. Remove Though so the sentence can stand independently. Also, tired completes the meaning after feel dehydrated and tired.
× Personally, I would definitely feel burned out a lot when it is at the end of the month when I have to, uh, mark all the tests and then made reports and send it to the parents. So the workload made me feel a little bit overwhelmed.
✓ Personally, I would definitely feel very burned out at the end of the month, when I have to, uh, mark all the tests, make reports, and send them to the parents. So, the workload makes me feel a little overwhelmed.
Use at the end of the month, not when it is at the end of the month, because the former is the correct time expression. After have to, the verbs should be in the base form: mark, make, and send. Reports is plural, so use the pronoun them instead of it. Because this describes a usual situation in the present, use makes rather than the past-tense form made.
× For most of the time I would choose to lie down and entertain myself using social media, watching short reels and clips on Tik Toks and YouTube.
✓ Most of the time, I would choose to lie down and entertain myself by using social media and watching short reels and clips on TikTok and YouTube.
The correct fixed expression is most of the time, not for most of the time. By using and watching creates a clearer parallel structure. TikTok is the name of one platform and is normally written in the singular form.
× We would depend on how close I am to this person and how important this meeting will be. I will not force myself to spend the last strength and energy to to do social meetings, but I would love to relax with my friends and my close one.
✓ It would depend on how close I am to the person and how important the meeting would be. I would not force myself to spend my last bit of strength and energy on social events, but I would love to relax with my friends and my close ones.
Use It as the subject because the situation, not We, depends on the factors mentioned. Since the answer describes a hypothetical choice, would is more consistent than will. Use the plural form close ones because the speaker is referring to close people in general. The repeated infinitive marker to to should be reduced to one to; the correction uses the more natural preposition on with spend energy.
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