Tiredness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more natural and concise. Start with a direct topic sentence (Yes/No + brief reason), then add one specific supporting detail. Avoid irrelevant or confusing time phrasing (you wrote 2:00 PM–6:00 PM which sounds like daytime sleep). Use linking words to connect ideas and keep to no more than 3–4 short sentences.

예시: Yes, I often feel tired because I don't get enough sleep. For example, I usually sleep only a few hours at night and sometimes take a short daytime nap from about 2:00 to 4:00 PM. Because of that, I plan to go to bed earlier to feel more rested.

제안: Use correct tense and a clear topic sentence. Answer directly (e.g., “I feel tired in the evening when…”), then provide one specific reason. Avoid filler words like “uh” and “umm,” and use a linking word (because/so) for coherence.

예시: I usually feel most tired in the evening when I'm studying because my concentration drops after several hours of work. For instance, around 8–10 pm I start to feel sleepy and my reading becomes slower.

제안: Give a polished, grammatical response with a clear structure: topic sentence + supporting detail + brief result. Use correct verb forms and combine short fragments into complete sentences. Specify duration and effect and use a linking word (so/therefore) to show result.

예시: When I feel tired, I usually take a short nap of about twenty minutes. This quick rest helps me feel happier and reduces my stress, so I can continue working with better focus.

× Yeah, I also feel tired because I don't have enough time to sleep. I usually sleep between 2:00 PM and 6:00 PM, so I should take more time to sleep.

✓ Yeah, I often feel tired because I don't have enough time to sleep. I usually sleep between 2:00 AM and 6:00 AM, so I should allow myself more time to sleep.

Use present simple 'often feel' to match habitual action; 'also' was unnecessary and can change meaning. Time reference '2:00 PM and 6:00 PM' conflicts with typical nighttime sleep, likely intended 'AM'; correct to 'AM' if night sleep was meant. 'Should take more time to sleep' is awkward; use 'allow myself more time to sleep' for natural phrasing and clear subject. Suggestions: replace 'also' with 'often' for frequency, check AM/PM, and use 'allow myself' or 'get' more sleep for natural English.

× Uh, I feel tired when I was studying at evening. Umm, you go.

✓ Uh, I felt tired when I was studying in the evening. Umm, you go ahead.

The sentence mixes present 'I feel' with past 'was studying'; both actions refer to a past event so use simple past 'I felt'. Use the preposition 'in' with 'the evening' for correct idiom. 'You go' is informal and incomplete in this context; 'you go ahead' is a polite conversational prompt. Suggestions: keep tense consistent (past+past or present+present), use 'in the evening', and use full conversational phrases like 'you go ahead'.

× Oh when I feel tired I usually take a nap around 20 minutes.

✓ Oh, when I feel tired I usually take a nap of around 20 minutes.

Use a noun phrase 'a nap of around 20 minutes' or 'a 20-minute nap' to describe duration. The original 'around 20 minutes' after 'take a nap' needs a preposition 'of' or hyphenated adjective form. Also add a comma after 'Oh' for natural speech pause. Suggestions: say 'I usually take a 20-minute nap' or 'I take a nap of around 20 minutes'.

× Taking a nap feel make me happy and. Reducing my stress.

✓ Taking a nap makes me happy and reduces my stress.

The original has incorrect verb forms and fragmented sentence. 'Taking a nap' is a gerund subject and requires singular verb 'makes' (subject-verb agreement). 'Feel make' is ungrammatical; use 'makes'. Combine clauses into one sentence: 'and reduces my stress' uses present simple to match habitual effect. Suggestions: use 'makes' and 'reduces' for correct agreement and combine fragments into a single coherent sentence.