Tiredness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Clarify and correct basic language, reduce redundancy, and make sentences natural and coherent. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct vocabulary (use “feel tired” not “fear tired”), combine short fragments into complete sentences, and add one specific detail. Use linking words like “because” and “so” correctly.

예시: Yes, I often feel tired because I work long hours and sometimes sleep late. After a full day at the office I usually feel exhausted, so I need to rest before I can do anything else.

제안: Make the response more concise and grammatically correct. Begin with a direct topic sentence, then give a specific example and connect ideas with linking words like “for example” and “so”. Avoid unnecessary words such as “where” at the start.

예시: I usually feel tired after a long day of work or studying because I spend many hours on tasks and meetings. For example, when I study until midnight I become sleepy and low on energy, so I take a short break and drink a glass of water to refresh myself.

제안: This answer is clear and relevant but needs small grammatical fixes and slightly more natural phrasing. Keep it within four sentences, use correct verb forms (e.g. “helps” not “help”), and add a brief reason or result with a linking word like “so” or “therefore.”

예시: I usually take a short nap when I feel tired because it helps me feel more awake and focused. For example, I often sleep for about 20 minutes in the afternoon, so I can return to my work feeling more productive.

× Well yes, I usually fear tired because I work long hours and sometimes sleep late.

✓ Well yes, I usually feel tired because I work long hours and sometimes sleep late.

The verb 'fear' is incorrect here; the correct verb is 'feel' to describe a state. This is a present tense state verb error (Present tense issue, ID 6) and also a word choice error. Use 'feel tired' for current conditions. Suggestion: use 'feel' with adjectives describing states (I feel tired).

× For instance after full day.

✓ For instance, after a full day.

This fragment lacks an article and is incomplete as a sentence (Sentence structure errors, ID 26 and Article errors, ID 22). Add the indefinite article 'a' and a comma after 'For instance' to make it a proper clause. Complete sentences should have a subject and verb when needed, e.g. 'For instance, after a full day I feel exhausted.'

× It's the office.

✓ It is because of the office.

'It's the office' is unclear and colloquial; the intended meaning is likely 'because of the office' or 'because of work' (Incorrect use of the definite article, ID 17 and Sentence structure errors, ID 26). Use a full clause to explain the cause: 'It is because of the office' or better 'It is because of work.'

× I usually feel exhausted in the evening so I need to rest before I can do anything else.

✓ I usually feel exhausted in the evening, so I need to rest before I can do anything else.

This sentence is correct in verb forms but needs a comma before 'so' to join clauses properly (Sentence structure, ID 26). Keep verb forms as they are; punctuation improves clarity.

× Where I usually feel tired after long day at work or study because I spend my hours focusing on tasks and meetings.

✓ I usually feel tired after a long day of work or study because I spend my hours focusing on tasks and meetings.

'Where' is incorrect here; use a subject 'I' to start the sentence (Sentence structure error, ID 26). Also add the article 'a' before 'long day' and use preposition 'of' with 'a long day of work or study' (Incorrect use of prepositions/articles, IDs 11 and 22).

× For example, one day is when I study until late, I feel sleepy and have low energy, so I try to rest and drink a glass of water.

✓ For example, when I study until late I feel sleepy and have low energy, so I try to rest and drink a glass of water.

The phrase 'one day is when' is awkward and unnecessary (Sentence structure errors, ID 26). Remove 'one day is' and join clauses correctly. Maintain present simple tense for habitual actions.

× OK, I usually take a short nap when I feel tired because it help me feel more awake and focusing.

✓ OK, I usually take a short nap when I feel tired because it helps me feel more awake and focused.

'Help' should be 'helps' to agree with the singular subject 'it' (Third person singular issue, ID 2 / Subject-verb agreement, ID 27). 'Focusing' is the wrong form; use the adjective 'focused' to describe state (Verb + -ing form, ID 8 / Incorrect use of adjectives or adverbs, ID 13).

× For example, I often sleep for about 20 minutes in the afternoon and then I can finish my work better.

✓ For example, I often nap for about 20 minutes in the afternoon and then I can finish my work better.

'Sleep for about 20 minutes' is understandable but 'nap' is a more natural verb collocation for short daytime sleep (Present tense issue / word choice, ID 6). Verb forms are otherwise correct; prefer 'nap' to improve naturalness.