Politeness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: 文法と語順の誤りを直し、意味が明確になるよう簡潔に述べる練習をしてください。まず主題文で「誰から学んだか」を示し、その後で観察や理由などの具体的な補足情報を1〜2文で加えましょう。接続詞（because, by observing, so）や前置詞（from, about）を正しく使うことに注意してください。発音や語の切れ目も練習して、文が流れるように話すと自然に聞こえます。

예시: I learned to be polite by observing my mother and older sister when I was a child. They always treated others with respect, so I copied their behavior and practiced the same greetings and manners.

제안: 答えは肯定で始め、理由を1文で簡潔に述べてください。断片的な文ではなく、接続詞を使って文をつなげ、具体例（習慣や結果）を示すと説得力が増します。語法（every people→everyone, express my habit→express my respect）を正しく使い、最大5文以内に収めてください。

예시: Yes, I think politeness is very important because greeting everyone shows respect. For example, saying hello and smiling helps me build good relationships at work and school.

제안: 直接質問に答えるトピック文を作り、その後に具体例や理由を続けてください。文のつながりを明確にするために接続詞（for example, especially, such as）を使い、冗長や不自然な表現（“so I should be proud”は文脈に合わない）を避けましょう。

예시: We should be polite in many situations, especially when meeting someone for the first time. For example, a polite greeting and a friendly attitude help create a good first impression.

제안: 重複語や時制のずれを直し、理由と結果を論理的に繋げてください（because → so / which helped）。具体的な行動を一つ挙げ、それがどんな効果をもたらしたかを簡潔に説明すると良いです。語彙を少し変えて冗長さを減らしましょう。

예시: As a child, I used to greet people and bow to show respect. This polite behavior helped me build stronger relationships with neighbors and teachers.

× I landed by. Observing my mom and sister like my families when I was a child because they are very care about brightness.

✓ I learned to be polite by observing my mother and sister when I was a child because they cared a lot about good manners.

The original contains multiple sentence fragments and incorrect word choices. 'landed by' is incorrect for 'learned by' (verb choice), 'Observing...' is a fragment; combine into one sentence. 'mom' -> 'mother' (formal), 'like my families' is incorrect use of 'like' and 'families' (plural); use 'my mother and sister'. 'they are very care about brightness' has wrong verb form and noun: use 'they cared a lot about good manners' or 'they cared about being polite'. Suggestion: make a single complete sentence with correct verb 'learned', correct subject phrases, and appropriate noun phrase 'good manners'.

× Yes, I think so because. By greeting every people I meet, I can express. My habit and it leads to the.

✓ Yes, I think so because by greeting every person I meet, I can show my politeness and it helps build good relationships.

Original has sentence fragments and improper noun use. 'because.' ends the clause prematurely; 'every people' is incorrect — use 'every person' or 'people I meet'. 'express. My habit' is fragmented; combine ideas: 'show my politeness' or 'express good manners'. 'it leads to the.' is incomplete; specify result: 'helps build good relationships'. Suggestion: connect clauses and use singular/plural correctly and complete the result clause.

× When I meet someone for the first time. Is a. One of the very important opportunities, so I should be proud.

✓ Meeting someone for the first time is a very important opportunity, so I should be polite and show respect.

Original is broken into fragments: 'When I meet someone for the first time.' is a subordinate clause that cannot stand alone; 'Is a.' is a fragment. 'I should be proud' is odd in this context; likely meant 'I should be polite' or 'I should show respect.' Combine into a single complete sentence, use appropriate main clause and clear intention.

× I used to greet greet people when I was a child because by bowing to people I can express my respect to them and it leads to deep deepening the relationships.

✓ I used to greet people when I was a child because by bowing to people I could express my respect and strengthen relationships.

Original repeats 'greet', has awkward structure and tense mismatch. 'used to' indicates past habit, so subsequent clause should use past modals 'could' rather than 'can'. 'deep deepening the relationships' is ungrammatical; use 'strengthen relationships' or 'deepen relationships'. Remove repetition and choose verbs that match past habitual context.