Paper— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be direct and grammatically correct. Start with a clear topic sentence saying whether you have made paper crafts, then give one or two brief reasons or examples. Avoid incorrect words ("art crime") and verb form errors. Keep to 2–3 sentences and use linking words such as "because" or "so."

예시: No, I haven't made many paper crafts. I find art activities rather tedious, so I usually avoid them and prefer other hobbies like reading.

제안: Improve grammar and sentence flow. Begin with a concise direct answer (Yes/No), then add a short reason using linking words like "because" or "so." Reduce redundancy ("text texting message apps").

예시: No, I rarely write physical letters these days because people rely on email and messaging apps for quick communication.

제안: Give a clearer position and use specific examples. Use correct noun forms and articles ("letters," "these letters"). Use linking phrases like "however" or "for example" to contrast ideas. Keep answers concise and avoid repeating "I think."

예시: Yes, some people keep handwritten letters, especially those with sentimental value such as love letters or notes from relatives. However, most routine correspondence has been replaced by email and messages.

제안: Correct vocabulary and clarity are essential. Give a direct answer (Yes/No) and explain briefly with correct nouns ("pen," not "pant") and verbs. Use linking words like "because" and simple phrases such as "in case of emergencies." Avoid confusing sentence fragments.

예시: Yes, I usually carry a pen and a small notebook when I go out because I like to jot down ideas or phone numbers in case of emergencies.

제안: Provide a clear topic sentence then one or two specific details. Use correct past tense and phrasing ("I often drew on the walls, which made my mother upset"). Avoid unclear words like "scrolled." Use linking words like "so" to show consequence.

예시: As a child, I mainly used paper and pens for drawing. I was a bit naughty and sometimes drew on the walls, which often upset my mother.

× Oh, unfortunately, I found art activities tedious for myself.

✓ Oh, unfortunately, I find art activities tedious.

The student used past tense 'found' but is describing a current preference; use present tense 'find'. Also 'for myself' is unnecessary and awkward here. Suggestion: use simple present for general statements about current feelings.

× So I avoid involving in any art crime.

✓ So I avoid getting involved in any art activities.

The phrase 'involving in' is incorrect; the correct structure is 'get involved in' or simply 'involved in'. Also 'art crime' is incorrect word choice; likely meant 'art activities' or 'arts and crafts'. Suggestion: use 'avoid getting involved in' or 'avoid participating in'.

× So yes I haven't do any paper craft in the past.

✓ So no, I haven't done any paper crafts in the past.

The negative present perfect requires past participle 'done' not base form 'do'. Also 'paper craft' should be plural 'paper crafts' when speaking generally. 'So yes' contradicted meaning; changed to 'So no' to match content. Use present perfect to indicate experience up to now.

× Oh with the increasing number of advanced technologies, people highly relied on email and text texting message apps so I seldom write physical letters nowadays.

✓ Oh, with the rise of advanced technologies, people rely heavily on email and messaging apps, so I seldom write physical letters nowadays.

Mixed tenses: 'relied' (past) conflicts with 'nowadays'. Use present 'rely' for a general fact. 'highly relied' is incorrect word order; correct adverb placement is 'rely heavily'. 'text texting message apps' is redundant; use 'messaging apps' or 'texting apps'.

× I think so, but I think the purposes of keeping this physical letter is some very important letters for themselves.

✓ I think so, but I think the purpose of keeping physical letters is to save very important letters for oneself.

Problems: 'purposes' should be singular 'purpose' when followed by infinitive construction; 'this physical letter' is inconsistent—use plural 'physical letters'. 'is some very important letters' mixes singular verb with plural noun; restructure to 'is to save very important letters'. 'themselves' is a reflexive pronoun misused for general subject; use 'oneself' or rephrase. Suggestion: simplify and maintain number agreement.

× Otherwise most of the letter has already been replaced by email or text.

✓ Otherwise most of the letters have already been replaced by email or text messages.

Mismatch between plural subject 'most of the letters' and singular verb 'has'; use 'have'. 'letter' should be plural when referring to many. Also 'text' is better as 'text messages' for clarity.

× Oh, I think I'm the special one.

✓ Oh, I think I'm the only one.

'the special one' is odd in this context; likely intended 'the only one' meaning unique among peers. Use 'only' for exclusivity. This corrects meaning rather than strict grammar but improves naturalness.

× I still always carry a pant in my bed.

✓ I still always carry a pen in my bag.

Several word choice errors: 'pant' should be 'pen'; 'in my bed' should be 'in my bag' or 'with me'. 'Carry a pen in my bag' is the correct and natural phrase. Suggest checking homophones and common nouns.

× I don't know the reason why because the first thing come to my mind is I need a pen to form emergency circumstances.

✓ I don't know why, but the first thing that comes to my mind is that I might need a pen in an emergency.

Multiple issues: unnecessary 'the reason why because' is redundant; use 'I don't know why' or 'I don't know the reason'. 'come' should be 'comes' to agree with 'the first thing'. 'to form emergency circumstances' is incorrect phrasing; correct is 'in an emergency' or 'in case of an emergency'. Also add 'that' to introduce the noun clause. Suggest simplifying sentences and ensuring subject-verb agreement.

× When I was a kid I used paper and pen for drawing mainly so sometimes actually I was quite naughty.

✓ When I was a kid I mainly used paper and pen for drawing, so sometimes I was quite naughty.

Word order: place 'mainly' before the verb phrase 'used paper and pen'. 'actually' is unnecessary. Sentence is past tense so 'used' and 'was' are correct; just improve adverb placement and remove filler words.

× I would use the pen for drawing on the wall that I usually was it scrolled by my mother.

✓ I would use the pen to draw on the wall, and my mother would usually scold me for it.

'for drawing on' is acceptable but 'use the pen to draw on the wall' is more natural. 'that I usually was it scrolled by my mother' is ungrammatical: 'scrolled' is wrong verb and passive order is incorrect. Correct is 'my mother would usually scold me for it.' Use active voice and correct verb 'scold'.