Paper— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and grammatical. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one specific example with a short reason. Avoid repetition and filler words. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, "for example", "because").

예시: Yes, I often make paper crafts. For example, I enjoy folding paper airplanes because it helps me relax after studying. In addition, I sometimes make origami figures to decorate my room.

제안: Give a direct answer and clear reasons with correct grammar. Avoid hesitation and unnecessary repetition. Use linking words like "because" and provide a concise concluding remark. Be specific about when you prefer paper over digital.

예시: Yes, I still write physical letters occasionally because electronic devices can run out of battery and feel impersonal. For instance, I write postcards to relatives when I travel because they appreciate the personal touch.

제안: Provide a clear opinion, support it with a specific reason and an example. Fix grammar (subject-verb agreement) and avoid trailing off. Use linking words like "however" or "although" to show contrast if needed.

예시: I think fewer people keep handwritten letters today because most communication happens on mobile phones. However, some people still save special notes or cards, for example birthdays, as keepsakes.

제안: Answer directly and describe a typical situation. Remove filler words and repeat phrases. Use one or two supporting details with linking words like "because" or "so" to explain why you carry them.

예시: Yes, I usually carry a small notebook and a pen because I like to jot down ideas when I am outdoors. For example, when I go for a walk or ride, I write notes to organize my thoughts.

제안: Start with a clear topic sentence about your childhood habit, give a specific activity and reason, and finish with a concise current status. Avoid hesitation and repetition. Use past tense consistently when talking about childhood.

예시: As a child, I loved writing in notebooks because I wanted to become a writer. I wrote short stories and kept a diary, which helped me improve my language skills; I still enjoy writing today.

× I really like make airplane, paper airplane.

✓ I really like making paper airplanes.

After 'like' when referring to general preferences use the gerund form 'making'. Also 'paper airplane' should be plural 'paper airplanes' for general habits (singular/plural agreement). Use correct word order: 'making paper airplanes.'

× It is a great way to reduce my stress. So I have I feel nervous.

✓ It is a great way to reduce my stress, so I don't feel nervous.

The original repeats subjects and mixes ideas. Use a single coordinated sentence with correct negation: 'don't feel nervous.' This fixes sentence structure and clarity.

× Of course, I I prefer to write, write the paper, because, uh using technology device is not convenience for me.

✓ Of course, I prefer to write on paper because using electronic devices is not convenient for me.

Remove repeated words, use the correct preposition 'on paper' and the adjective 'convenient'. 'Technology device' is unnatural; use 'electronic devices.' Also fix article and word order.

× It is this device need a charge battery, so uh, when I when I need to read, I usually enjoy.

✓ These devices need charged batteries, so when I need to read, I usually enjoy reading physical text.

Change 'it is this device need' to 'these devices need'. Use 'charged batteries' (past participle as adjective). Clarify the second clause to complete the idea: 'enjoy reading physical text.'

× To be honest, uh, in modern social societies, most people doesn't prefer to write a, to write a handwriter because, uh, mobile phone, most people uses the mobile phone.

✓ To be honest, in modern societies, most people don't prefer handwriting because most people use mobile phones.

Use 'don't' for plural subjects (subject-verb agreement). 'Handwriter' is incorrect; use 'handwriting'. Simplify 'modern social societies' to 'modern societies' and correct verb forms: 'use' not 'uses'.

× So, uh, when I have comments to my friends, uh, most people.

✓ So when I want to comment to my friends, I usually use my phone.

Original sentence is incomplete and unclear. Provide a complete clause showing subject and verb. Match context by explaining how the speaker contacts friends.

× Of course, uh, sometime I have a problem.

✓ Of course, sometimes I have a problem.

Use 'sometimes' (adverb) not 'sometime' to indicate occasional occurrences.

× I prefer to live outdoor to, to, to organize my thinking.

✓ I prefer to live outdoors to organize my thinking.

Use the adverb 'outdoors' not the adjective 'outdoor' after 'live'. Remove repeated fillers and extra commas.

× So, uh, this situation need to, uh, paper and pen.

✓ So this situation requires paper and a pen.

Use correct verb 'requires' for singular 'situation'. Add article 'a' before 'pen' and remove fillers.

× So I usually enjoy the ride.

✓ So I usually enjoy the ride.

This sentence is acceptable but contextually vague; it is grammatically correct in present tense. No change needed.

× When I was younger, I enjoyed it, right? Uh, write a notebook, uh, when I was younger, I want to become, become a writer.

✓ When I was younger, I enjoyed writing in a notebook; I wanted to become a writer.

Use past tense consistently: 'wanted' not 'want'. Use gerund 'writing' and the preposition 'in' with 'notebook'. Remove repetition.

× So, uh, writing is a great way to, to improve my writing abilities. Uh, currently I still.

✓ Writing was a great way to improve my writing abilities, and currently I still write.

Maintain tense consistency: if referring to past practice, use 'was'. Complete the final clause: 'I still write.' Remove repetition and use 'abilities' is acceptable but 'skills' is more natural.