Music— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Clarify your main idea with a clear topic sentence, correct grammar, and specific reasons. Keep it natural and concise (max 5 sentences). Use linking words to connect ideas (e.g., because, so, therefore). Correct key vocabulary (e.g., "sad music" not "says sound").

예시: I prefer sad music because it matches my mood when I feel down. For example, when my family situation stresses me, sad songs help me relax and reflect. Therefore, I often choose slow, melodic tracks that calm me.

제안: Give a direct yes/no with a brief explanation and specific examples. Use linking words (e.g., because, so, for example) and correct vocabulary ("energetic" or "uplifting" rather than "noisy"). Keep it 2–4 sentences and avoid vague phrasing.

예시: Yes, happy music does make me feel more excited because the upbeat tempo and lively instruments lift my mood. For example, upbeat pop songs make me want to move and feel more energetic when I exercise.

제안: Answer directly, then expand with a clear reason and plan. Use correct verbs and phrases ("attend a music class" not "drawing a music class"). Mention what kind of class you would like and why. Keep it within 1–4 sentences.

예시: No, I haven't taken any music classes, but I would like to attend piano lessons in the future. I don't have time now because of my heavy class schedule, so I plan to join one next year when my workload is lighter.

제안: Respond with a clear topic sentence and give specific examples using varied vocabulary. Avoid repetition and use linking words (e.g., for example, such as). Correct spelling ("music") and be concise (no more than 5 sentences).

예시: Yes, I listen to music a lot while doing other activities. For example, I play classical or lo-fi tracks when I'm solving math problems because they help me concentrate, and I listen to upbeat songs in the shower to wake up.

× I most prefer says sound cause every time my feeling is very low because of my surrounding and because of my family.

✓ I prefer sad music most of all because my mood often gets low due to my surroundings and my family.

The original has multiple issues: incorrect word choice ('says sound'), wrong word order, and unclear structure. This fits 'Sentence structure errors' and 'Incorrect use of adjectives/adverbs' plus subject-verb agreement problems. Rewrite to a clear subject-verb-object structure: 'I prefer sad music most of all' and explain reasons with 'because' followed by concise noun phrases 'my surroundings and my family'. Use 'mood often gets low' instead of 'my feeling is very low' for natural English.

× Yeah, like it achieved the sound because it was very noisy for me.

✓ Yes, it excites me because the sound is very lively/noisy.

The original uses 'achieved' incorrectly (past participle) and awkward phrasing. The student means that happy music makes them feel excited. Use the present simple 'it excites me' to answer a general question about what happy music does. Choose 'lively' or 'noisy' depending on intended meaning. Avoid past tense 'achieved' which is incorrect here.

× No, if I have a chance I want to be drawing a music class.

✓ No, but if I have a chance I want to take a music class.

The phrase 'want to be drawing a music class' is incorrect: 'drawing' is wrong verb and 'be' unnecessary. Use the modal construction 'want to' plus base verb 'take' to express desire. Keep present simple 'have' for a real conditional about future opportunity.

× But now now I have a many classes to do.

✓ But right now I have many classes to attend/do.

Duplicate 'now' and incorrect article 'a' before 'many'. 'Many' is used with plural nouns without 'a'. Use 'right now' for emphasis and 'classes to attend' or 'classes to do' for clarity.

× Yeah, I always listen to music while doing other things, like I'm solving the mathematical problem.

✓ Yes, I always listen to music while doing other things, for example when I'm solving math problems.

'The mathematical problem' is unnatural; use plural 'math problems' or 'a math problem' and place 'when' to introduce the clause. Maintain present continuous 'I'm solving' for actions happening while listening.

× I listen to muses while I shower.

✓ I listen to music while I shower.

'Muses' is incorrect; the correct noun is 'music'. This is a word choice error. Keep simple present 'listen' for habitual actions.

× I listen to music most of the time.

✓ I listen to music most of the time.

This sentence is correct; no grammatical correction needed. It appropriately uses present simple to describe a habitual action.

× I listen to muses while I'm doing something.

✓ I listen to music while I'm doing things.

Again 'muses' should be 'music'. 'Something' is vague and singular; 'things' better matches 'while I'm doing things' to express various activities. Use present continuous 'I'm doing' for ongoing actions.