Music— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more precise and avoid vague phrases. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons and an example. Use linking words like 'because' or 'so' to connect ideas.

예시: I prefer sad music because it helps me process emotions and relax after a long day. For example, I often listen to acoustic ballads with mellow piano and soft vocals when I'm studying or winding down.

제안: Answer directly and explain what you mean by 'updates' using clear vocabulary. Give a short reason or example to support your view and use a linking word such as 'because' or 'so'.

예시: Yes, happy music usually makes me feel more energetic because it has a faster tempo and upbeat rhythms. For instance, I feel more motivated to exercise when I listen to pop songs with lively beats.

제안: Clarify your meaning and use correct nouns and adjectives. Begin with a direct statement about whether you took classes, then briefly describe what they involved using specific language (e.g., theory, instrument lessons).

예시: Yes, I took basic music classes at school where we learned music theory and how to read sheet music. The lessons focused on rhythm, scales, and simple piano exercises.

제안: Organize your answer: give a clear topic sentence, then one or two specific details. Correct grammar (music is uncountable), avoid repetition, and explain why you choose that artist or mood. Use linking words like 'because' or 'for example'.

예시: Yes, I often listen to music while bathing because it helps me relax. For example, I usually play Bruno Mars songs since his voice suits my playlist and his slower ballads create a calm atmosphere.

× Yes, most of them are updates.

✓ Yes, most of them are upbeat.

The student used 'updates', which is the wrong word. The intended idea is likely 'upbeat' (meaning cheerful or lively). This is a vocabulary/word choice error affecting sentence meaning. Suggestion: replace incorrect word with the appropriate adjective that matches the context; ensure the adjective fits the question about whether happy music makes them feel excited. Note: This correction does not match a numbered item exactly from the provided list, but it addresses the clear lexical mistake.

× I did, but it's mostly textbook comedy.

✓ I did, but it was mostly textbook material on comedy.

The original 'it's mostly textbook comedy' is unclear and uses 'it' ambiguously; 'textbook comedy' is not a natural collocation for music classes. The likely meaning is 'textbook material' or 'textbook exercises' about comedy. This is a choice and noun phrase clarity issue. Suggestion: clarify the noun ('material') and match tense and number. Using 'it was' matches the past reference to the class.

× Yes, I listen to music every time I take a bath, especially musics, All Bruno Mars.

✓ Yes, I listen to music every time I take a bath, especially songs by Bruno Mars.

'Musics' is incorrect because 'music' is an uncountable noun and does not usually take a plural form. Also 'All Bruno Mars' is not natural; the correct phrasing is 'songs by Bruno Mars' or 'everything by Bruno Mars'. Suggestion: use 'music' as uncountable or 'songs' as the plural countable noun and express the artist relationship with 'by'. Ensure punctuation and capitalization are appropriate.

× They just fit my voice range and most of them are sad sounds.

✓ They just fit my vocal range and most of them are sad songs.

'Voice range' is better expressed as 'vocal range'; 'sad sounds' is awkward when referring to music pieces—'sad songs' is the natural collocation. This is an adjective/noun collocation issue. Suggestion: use 'vocal range' for singing context and 'songs' rather than 'sounds' to describe musical pieces.