Music— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve grammar, sentence structure and clarity. Start with a clear topic sentence stating your preference, then give one specific reason with a linking word. Correct verb forms and possessives, and avoid redundancy (e.g., “of all hectic schedule”). Make the second idea a contrast using a linking word like “however” and give a concise reason why you sometimes choose sad music.

예시: I usually prefer happy music because it helps me relax after a hectic day. For example, upbeat songs lift my mood and make it easier to focus. However, sometimes I choose sad music because it matches my emotions and helps me reflect.

제안: Make the response more natural by using a short topic sentence, correct subject-verb agreement, and one specific supporting detail. Use a linking word to connect the explanation and avoid vague phrases like “feels more excited.”

예시: Yes, definitely. Happy music usually makes me feel more energetic because upbeat rhythms and lively melodies boost my energy. For instance, I often listen to fast pop songs when I need motivation to exercise.

× I usually prefer happy music because it helps to reduce my stress of all hectic schedule.

✓ I usually prefer happy music because it helps to reduce the stress of my hectic schedule.

The phrase 'stress of all hectic schedule' uses incorrect prepositions and word order. Use 'the stress of my hectic schedule' to show possession and correct noun order. Alternatively, 'reduce my stress from a hectic schedule' also works. Ensure 'my' precedes 'hectic schedule' and include the definite article 'the' before 'stress' for natural English.

× But at the moment I love listen sad music because it is attached with our my emotion.

✓ But at the moment I love listening to sad music because it is connected to my emotions.

After verbs like 'love' when expressing an activity, use the -ing form: 'love listening'. Also use the preposition 'to' after 'listening', replace 'attached with' (incorrect collocation) with 'connected to', and remove the redundant pronoun 'our' leaving 'my emotions'. Use plural 'emotions' for natural expression.

× Yes definitely, happy music feels more excited as compared to sad songs because it reduce our stress and uplift our mood.

✓ Yes, definitely. Happy music makes me feel more excited compared to sad songs because it reduces our stress and uplifts our mood.

Several issues: 'feels more excited' incorrectly uses 'feels' with 'music' — use 'makes me feel' to express effect on a person. 'As compared to' is wordy; 'compared to' suffices. Verb agreement: 'reduce' should be 'reduces' (singular subject 'music' or general third person). Also add commas and split into clearer sentences. 'Uplift' as verb needs 's' for third person: 'uplifts'. These changes fix person reference and subject-verb agreement and article/phrase usage.