Music— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and grammatical: start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific reasons with linking words. Avoid filler words (uh) and correct verb forms and prepositions (e.g., “listen to”).

예시: I prefer sad music. It helps me process emotions because the melodies and lyrics reflect how I feel, whether I’m sad or even surprisingly happy. For example, when I’m low, slow songs calm me; when I’m happy, they make my feelings feel deeper.

제안: Use correct grammar and clearer linking: answer directly, then give a specific example or result. Correct subject-verb agreement and verb forms, and replace vague phrases with precise descriptions.

예시: Yes, happy music makes me feel more excited. For instance, upbeat songs with a fast tempo and strong rhythm make me feel energetic and want to move, so I often dance or clap along when I hear them.

× I prefer sad music as uh whenever I feel very low or even I feel happy then I in both time I usually prefer to listen sad music because it connect my mind, my heart as well as my feelings.

✓ I prefer sad music because whenever I feel very low or even when I feel happy, I usually prefer to listen to sad music as it connects with my mind, my heart, and my feelings.

Multiple preposition and article issues: 'in both time' should be 'in both situations' or omitted; 'listen sad music' needs the preposition 'to' (listen to music); 'it connect' needs subject-verb agreement and the preposition 'with' after 'connects'. Also add 'when' for time clause clarity and commas for readability. Suggestion: use 'listen to', use 'connects with', include 'when' for conditional time clauses, and ensure verbs agree with singular subject ('it connects').

× it connect my mind, my heart as well as my feelings.

✓ it connects with my mind, my heart, and my feelings.

Verb form error: after the singular pronoun 'it' the verb must take the third person singular form 'connects' not 'connect'. Also 'connects with' is more natural than 'connect'. Use 'and' between list items and include commas. Suggestion: change verb to 'connects' and add 'with'.

× Yes, happy music do feel me more excited.

✓ Yes, happy music does make me feel more excited.

Subject-verb agreement and verb usage: 'music' is an uncountable singular noun so the auxiliary should be 'does' not 'do'. Also 'feel me more excited' is incorrect word order; use 'make me feel more excited'. Suggestion: use 'does make me feel' or simply 'makes me feel'.

× Whenever I listen to happy music I feel very energetic or sometimes I feel like my body is shaking or I loving the music.

✓ Whenever I listen to happy music, I feel very energetic; sometimes I feel like my body is shaking or that I am loving the music.

Pronoun and verb form and clause connection issues: the clause 'I loving the music' uses incorrect verb form; it should be 'I am loving' or better 'I love'. Also missing commas to separate clauses. 'That' can introduce the idea after 'feel like'. Suggestion: use correct verb forms ('I love' or 'I am loving') and add punctuation; prefer 'I love the music' for general feeling.

× So I think happy music will be more excited for me.

✓ So I think happy music makes me more excited.

Incorrect tense/modal and incorrect adjective use: 'will be more excited for me' is awkward because music cannot be 'excited'; the intended meaning is that it causes excitement. Use present simple 'makes me more excited' to express a general truth. Suggestion: replace with 'makes me more excited' or 'excites me more'.