Teachers— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and start with a clear topic sentence that directly answers the question. Avoid redundancy (e.g., "at the favorite"). Add one specific supporting detail or brief example to make your answer more meaningful. Use linking words to connect ideas (for example, "because" or "so").

예시: I don't have a favorite teacher from high school because most of them were strict and focused on discipline. For example, my chemistry teacher emphasized rules and homework deadlines rather than making lessons interactive, so I didn't feel particularly close to any of them.

제안: Begin with a direct, polished topic sentence and reduce repetition. Correct grammar ("I'm an introvert," "difficult for me to speak in public"). Give one concise reason with a linking word and, if possible, a brief example or consequence. Keep it within three sentences.

예시: No, I don't want to be a teacher because I'm an introvert and find public speaking very challenging. Also, I worry I wouldn't have the energy or confidence to manage a large class effectively.

제안: Answer clearly and avoid hesitations and repetitions. Start with a topic sentence and provide one or two specific details (for example, what she did that made her memorable). Use linking words like "because" or "for example" to make it coherent. Correct phrasing: "she spoke softly to students."

예시: Yes. I still remember my primary school Chinese teacher because she was very kind and spoke softly to every student. For example, she always stayed after class to help me with reading, which made me feel supported.

제안: Give a direct answer then briefly explain with clear grammar and no repetition. Use past tense correctly ("when I graduated"). Use linking words like "because" and provide one specific detail about why reconnection was difficult. Keep it to two or three sentences.

예시: No, I'm not still in touch with them. When I graduated I had no phone or social apps like WeChat, so it was hard to reconnect, and my parents also didn't keep in contact.

제안: Start by clarifying the premise (you don't have a single favorite) then give specific, coherent examples of how teachers helped you. Fix grammar ("gave immediate feedback," "without their help I couldn't have achieved my grades"). Use linking words like "for example" and avoid trailing fragments.

예시: I don't have one favorite teacher, but my teachers helped me in several ways. For example, they explained difficult topics clearly and gave prompt feedback on exams, which helped me improve my grades and ultimately succeed in exams.

제안: Answer directly and refine phrasing. Avoid filler words and repetitions. Use comparative language and give one clear reason with a concrete detail (example of a primary school memory vs a strict high school rule). Keep it within three sentences.

예시: Yes, I prefer my primary school teachers because I spent more time enjoying classes and building friendly relationships with them. In contrast, high school teachers were often strict and focused on discipline, which made me feel more anxious.

× They often focused on discipline rather than making lessons engaging, so none stood out at the favorite.

✓ They often focused on discipline rather than making lessons engaging, so none of them stood out as a favorite.

The original sentence has an incorrect phrase 'at the favorite' and missing subject reference. Use 'none of them' to refer to teachers and 'stood out as a favorite' is the correct idiom. Keep tense consistent (past simple 'focused').

× I don't want to be a teacher in the future because I'm a one is because I'm a introvert person and it's quite difficult for me to speak in public.

✓ I don't want to be a teacher in the future because I'm an introvert and it's quite difficult for me to speak in public.

The original contains repeated and mixed fragments 'I'm a one is because I'm a introvert person'. Remove redundancy and fix article before a vowel sound: 'an introvert'. Maintain present simple for general truth about personality.

× The second reason is I'm afraid I don't have the responsibility and the energy to control so many people.

✓ The second reason is I'm afraid I don't have the responsibility or the energy to manage so many people.

Use 'or' when listing alternatives rather than 'and' when expressing lack of either quality. 'Manage' or 'supervise' is more natural than 'control' for teachers. Maintain present simple for current ability/fear.

× She was the most kind and warm, warm to warm teacher.

✓ She was the kindest and warmest teacher.

Use superlative forms 'kindest' and 'warmest' when comparing within a group. Remove repeated words. Keep past tense 'was' to match memory.

× she, she talked her softly with students.

✓ She spoke softly to the students.

Use the verb 'speak' rather than 'talk' with 'to' when indicating addressing people. 'Spoke softly to the students' is concise and grammatically correct. Remove incorrect object 'her'.

× Actually not when I was graduated from my primary school, umm, I lose all connection with them because at that time I don't have my phone, I don't have my WeChat or Instagram and so on.

✓ Actually not. When I graduated from primary school, I lost all contact with them because at that time I didn't have a phone, WeChat, Instagram, or other ways to connect.

Use past simple 'graduated' and 'lost' for completed past events. Use past negation 'didn't have' for possessions in the past. 'Contact' is more natural than 'connection'. Use articles appropriately: 'a phone'.

× So it's really hard to connect, connect them.

✓ So it was really hard to contact them.

Use 'contact them' (verb + object) rather than 'connect them'. Use past tense 'was' to match previous sentence. Remove repetition.

× Umm and also my parents don't connect to them.

✓ Also, my parents didn't keep in touch with them either.

Use past tense 'didn't' for past situation. 'Keep in touch with' is the correct idiom for maintaining contact. 'Connect to' is incorrect in this context.

× They explain difficult subjects to me clearly and gave immediate feedbacks on my exams without their help.

✓ They explained difficult subjects to me clearly and gave immediate feedback on my exams. Without their help, I wouldn't have achieved such grades.

Maintain consistent past tense: 'explained' and 'gave'. 'Feedback' is uncountable, so not 'feedbacks'. The original clause 'without their help' was misplaced; split into a new sentence and use conditional 'wouldn't have' to express result.

× Without their help, I I can't get such grades and and successfully got into the.

✓ Without their help, I couldn't have gotten such grades and I wouldn't have been able to get into the school.

Use past conditional 'couldn't have gotten' to refer to unreal past. Remove repeated words. Finish the sentence with the object ('the school' or specific institution). Keep verb forms consistent and clear.

× Yes, I still remember my, my, my Chinese teacher in, in my primary school.

✓ Yes, I still remember my Chinese teacher from primary school.

Remove repetitions and use 'from primary school' or 'in primary school'. 'Still remember' is present simple used for memory; that's acceptable, but clean phrasing improves clarity.

× Yes, yes, I think, uh, in my primary school, I had spend a lot of time having fun and making friends with my teachers.

✓ Yes, I think in primary school I spent a lot of time having fun and getting to know my teachers.

Use past simple 'spent' for completed past actions rather than 'had spend'. 'Getting to know' is more natural than 'making friends with' for teachers. Maintain tense consistency.

× But in high school, many teachers are really serious and strict. Umm, and I, I, I, and to some extent I am afraid of them.

✓ But in high school many teachers were really serious and strict, and to some extent I was afraid of them.

Keep tense consistent: if referring to past high school, use past simple 'were' and 'was'. Remove repetitions and extra fillers. Use clear conjunction 'and'.

× So, so I'm more like my primary.

✓ So I'm closer to my primary school teachers.

Original fragment 'more like my primary' is incomplete. Clarify the comparison: 'closer to my primary school teachers' expresses preference. Maintain present or past tense depending on context; here present is acceptable as an overall feeling.