Tidiness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be direct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence stating whether you like to keep things tidy, then give one or two specific reasons with simple linking words (because, so). Avoid repetition and fumbling. Aim for natural phrasing and correct grammar.

예시: Yes, I generally like to keep things tidy because it helps me find things quickly and reduces stress. For example, I always put my keys and phone in the same place so I don’t lose them.

제안: Answer directly and avoid long hesitations or repeated words. Give a brief topic sentence about past habit, then add one specific example or explanation (who helped you, why). Use past tense correctly and limit to 2–4 sentences.

예시: No, I wasn’t tidy as a child. My mother usually cleaned my room because I preferred playing to tidying, so my clothes and toys were often left on the floor.

제안: Provide a clear method with one or two specific actions and use present simple. Avoid repetition and unfinished sentences. Use linking words (for example, also) to structure the response.

예시: I keep my study space tidy by having a daily routine. For example, I tidy my desk every evening, put all books back on the shelf, and use a box for loose papers so my desk stays organized.

제안: Give a clear opinion and support it with logical, specific reasons. Avoid unclear metaphors and filler words. Use linking words to list benefits (for example, because, also), and give a brief example or consequence.

예시: Yes, I think being tidy is important because it helps you stay focused and saves time. For instance, if your workspace is organized you can start tasks faster and avoid missing deadlines.

× Well, keeping things tidy depends on however you show the the responsibility or making some some tough decision to to hold the things that tidy in.

✓ Well, keeping things tidy depends on how you show responsibility or on making some tough decisions to keep things tidy.

Original contains incorrect connectors and redundant words ('however' and 'the the', repeated 'some', 'to to') and wrong verb forms. Use 'depends on how' + noun phrase for a condition and parallel nouns/gerunds: 'show responsibility' and 'making decisions'. Use 'keep' (base verb) with 'things tidy'. Remove repetitions and extra prepositions.

× Honestly, no, I'm really, really very lazy period.

✓ Honestly, no, I was really, really very lazy as a child.

The question asks about past habit ('as a child'), so past tense 'was' is appropriate instead of present 'am'. Also add time reference for clarity.

× So I'm a rare lazy person who, who doesn't clean his room at all.

✓ So I was a very lazy person who didn't clean my room at all.

Maintain past tense to match context. 'Rare lazy person' is unnatural; use 'very lazy person'. Also remove duplicate 'who'. Use 'my' instead of 'his' for first-person reference.

× Uh, all the things that, uh, that I need to do it, my mother do for, do it for me.

✓ All the things I needed to do, my mother did for me.

The original has extra filler words and incorrect auxiliary verbs. Use past tense 'needed' and 'did'. Remove unnecessary 'it' and duplicate fragments to form a clear clause.

× So I'm kinda, I'm gonna, I'm gonna very far away.

✓ So I was kind of distant from those responsibilities.

Original mixes present progressive 'I'm gonna' with unclear phrase 'very far away'. Use past tense 'was' and clearer expression 'distant from those responsibilities' to match meaning.

× Wow, I always planning and always have strategy in my mind, strategies in my mind.

✓ I always plan and always have strategies in mind.

Use simple present 'plan' for habitual actions, not 'planning' alone. 'Have strategies in mind' is a natural collocation; remove redundancy.

× So keeping my work tidy means that I have to think about, uh, about how about I, I have to, to think about how do I how do, how I was gonna, how I will gonna, how I'm gonna make my.

✓ So keeping my work tidy means that I have to think about how I am going to organize it.

Original has many disfluencies and incorrect question word order inside a declarative clause. Use 'how I am going to' (future-in-present planning) and 'organize it' to complete the idea. Avoid duplicated auxiliary verbs and question inversion.

× Of course, it's, it's very necessary because being tidy means being, uh, stable in your life, stable in your plans.

✓ Of course it's very necessary because being tidy means being more organised and having stability in your life and plans.

Improve word choice: 'organised' fits meaning better than repeated 'stable'. Keep present simple 'means'. Combine phrases for clarity and remove filler stutters.

× And also, uh, it, it, it, uh, it protects you from tuxedos because being, to be, it being not tidy means that you will be toxic by the time.

✓ Also, it protects you from trouble because being untidy can make your life chaotic over time.

Original uses nonsense 'tuxedos' and 'toxic' incorrectly. Replace with appropriate vocabulary: 'trouble' and 'chaotic' convey the intended negative consequences. Use 'can make' to express possibility and 'over time' for temporal idea.