Tidiness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: ปรับโครงสร้างประโยคให้ชัดเจน ตอบตรงคำถามด้วยประโยคหัวข้อแล้วตามด้วยรายละเอียดสั้นๆ หลีกเลี่ยงการใช้คำเติมเสียงเช่น “uh” และคำซ้ำซ้อน เพิ่มคำเชื่อมที่เหมาะสมและคำอธิบายที่เจาะจงเกี่ยวกับสถานการณ์ เช่น บอกว่าเมื่อไรหรือสภาพไหนที่ทำให้ไม่จัดของให้เรียบร้อย

예시: Yes, I like to keep things tidy. However, when I am very tired after a long day, I sometimes leave things out instead of putting them away. For example, after studying for several hours I often leave my books on the desk and plan to tidy them the next morning.

제안: ตอบตรงคำถามเกี่ยวกับอดีต (used to) โดยแยกความต่างระหว่างอดีตกับปัจจุบัน ใช้ประโยคสั้นๆ และให้รายละเอียดเฉพาะเจาะจง เช่น กิจกรรมที่ทำตอนเด็กและความถี่ที่ทำความสะอาด แก้การใช้คำซ้ำและคำฟุ่มเฟือย

예시: When I was a child I used to keep my room tidier than I do now. I regularly put my toys away after playing, but as a secondary school student I am now busier and often leave my books and clothes around in the evenings.

제안: ตอบด้วยขั้นตอนหรือวิธีการชัดเจน มอบตัวอย่างการจัดระเบียบ ใช้คำเชื่อมเพื่อความลื่นไหล และหลีกเลี่ยงคำพูดไม่จำเป็น ให้ข้อเท็จจริงว่าทำอะไรเป็นประจำเพื่อรักษาความเรียบร้อย

예시: My study space is usually somewhat messy, but I try to keep it functional. For example, I put my current textbooks on the left side of the desk and keep a pen holder on the right. If it becomes too cluttered, I spend ten minutes clearing unnecessary items before I start studying.

제안: ตอบให้สมดุลและชัดเจน เริ่มด้วยการระบุทัศนคติของคุณ (yes/no/maybe) แล้วให้เหตุผลสองประการ โดยใช้คำเชื่อมเช่น “however” หรือ “on the other hand” แต่ลดการใช้คำเติมเสียงและซ้ำซ้อน ให้ตัวอย่างผลดีหรือผลเสียของการมีระเบียบ

예시: I think being tidy is generally necessary because it saves time and helps you find things easily. However, some people prioritize comfort and may accept a bit of mess. For example, a tidy desk helps me start work faster, while a messy desk can make me lose important notes.

× Perfectly, I love to keep things tidy, however it takes a lot of attempts and uh, to make the stuff tidy, uh, for uh, for example, when I was tired during the whole day and I was too tidy something, I'm too lazy, too tidy into the correct place.

✓ Perfectly, I love to keep things tidy; however, it takes a lot of effort to make things tidy. For example, when I am tired after a long day, I am too lazy to put things in their correct place.

The original sentence used inconsistent and incorrect tense forms (was tired vs am), awkward pluralization and word choice (attempts -> effort; stuff -> things), and incorrect verb phrases (too tidy something; too tidy into the correct place). Use present simple to state general habits and present simple or present continuous for current states. Replace vague words with appropriate nouns and use correct verb patterns: 'too lazy to + base verb', and 'put things in their correct place'. Suggestions: use consistent present tense for habits, replace informal fillers, use 'effort' not 'attempts' for difficulty, and use 'too lazy to put' for ability/ willingness.

× I am in the secondary school right now, so I'm I often tired after studying for a whole day, so in the evening I spend more time reading the course book and doing homework so I don't have time to tidy up something in my room. I am I am too lazy to tidy up and clean my room.

✓ I am in secondary school right now, so I am often tired after studying all day. In the evening I spend more time reading my course books and doing homework, so I don't have time to tidy my room. I am too lazy to tidy and clean it.

Problems: redundant fillers and repeated pronouns, incorrect article use ('in the secondary school' -> 'in secondary school'), awkward phrase 'tidy up something' -> 'tidy my room', and inconsistent tense/word choice. Use present simple for routines, pluralize 'course books' if multiple, and remove repeated 'I am'. Use 'tidy my room' or 'tidy and clean it' instead of vague 'something'. Suggestions: simplify sentences, avoid repetition, use 'all day' for duration, and use correct nouns and object references.

× Uh, I work and study my, my space is not either tidy or too messy. I can tidy up my room, but, uh, I think I'm too lazy and I have, uh, I have to complete my homework, but I think I'm, I, I used, I'm used to being a room that is messy.

✓ When I work and study my space is neither tidy nor too messy. I can tidy up my room, but I am often too lazy because I have to complete my homework. Also, I am used to having a messy room.

Issues: incorrect use of 'either...or' and 'not either tidy or too messy' — use 'neither...nor'. Awkward adjective/noun phrase 'being a room that is messy' should be 'having a messy room' or 'a messy room'. Redundancy and filler words appear. 'I'm used to' requires a noun or verb+ing: 'used to having' or 'used to a messy room'. Suggestions: use 'neither...nor' for two negatives, use 'used to having' for habituation, and remove unnecessary fillers.

× Not at all. Because on the one hand, being the room is tidy and you keep the, uh, discipline of tidy up. So if, if you were to find things that you want without, uh, trying too hard to find something and it's a waste of time, uh, on the other hand, I believe that, uh, many people are too lazy to, to, uh, look after the room.

✓ Not at all. On the one hand, if the room is tidy and you keep the habit of tidying up, you can find what you want without wasting time. On the other hand, I believe many people are too lazy to look after their rooms.

Problems: incorrect conjunction and sentence structure. 'Because on the one hand' is redundant and misused; use 'On the one hand' then contrast with 'On the other hand'. 'Being the room is tidy' is ungrammatical; use 'if the room is tidy'. 'Discipline of tidy up' should be 'habit of tidying up'. Avoid 'were to find'—use 'find'. Pronoun agreement: 'their rooms' rather than 'the room' to generalize. Remove fillers and repetition. Suggestions: use proper contrast structure 'On the one hand... On the other hand...', use 'habit of tidying up', and simplify clauses.