Tidiness— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is relevant but a bit unclear and slightly repetitive. To improve: 1) Start with a clear topic sentence. 2) Use one or two specific reasons with concise supporting details. 3) Use linking words (for example, because, so) to connect ideas. 4) Correct small grammar and word-choice issues (e.g., “feel a good positive” → “feel good” or “feel uncomfortable”). Aim for 2–3 sentences, each clear and natural.

예시: Yes, I do. I like to keep my space tidy because it helps me concentrate, and clutter makes me feel uncomfortable. For example, when my desk is organized I can find things quickly and work more efficiently.

제안: Your answer is understandable but disorganized and contains grammatical errors. To improve: 1) Give a direct response about your past habit (Yes/No/Not really). 2) Follow with one specific detail or short example about childhood and contrast with now using a linking word (however, but). 3) Fix grammar (e.g., “I don't remember much about my childhood” and finish the sentence “the environment becomes…?”). Keep it to 2–3 concise sentences.

예시: I don't remember much about my childhood, but I think I wasn't very tidy then. However, now I make an effort to keep my room clean because it helps me focus and feel more relaxed.

× Yes, I think I like to keep this area around me clean and tidy.

✓ Yes, I like to keep the area around me clean and tidy.

The original contains unnecessary 'think' that makes the sentence awkward; tense is present simple for habits so 'I like to keep' is sufficient. Remove 'I think' or place it before 'I like' (e.g., 'I think I like...') but for clarity and direct response use 'I like to keep...'.

× It helps to stay focused and if I see the things here and there I don't feel a good positive.

✓ It helps me stay focused, and if I see things scattered around I don't feel good.

The sentence has awkward structure and incorrect phrasing. 'Helps to stay focused' needs an object 'me' (helps me stay focused). 'The things here and there' is unnatural; use 'things scattered around'. 'I don't feel a good positive' is ungrammatical; use 'I don't feel good' or 'I don't feel positive'. Also add a comma before the coordinating conjunction for clarity.

× I don't remember that much and during my childhood, but right now I like to keep the things clean and tidy because it helps me concentrate and the environment becomes. Have.

✓ I don't remember much about my childhood, but right now I like to keep things clean and tidy because it helps me concentrate and the environment is better.

Multiple problems: 'I don't remember that much and during my childhood' is ungrammatical—use 'I don't remember much about my childhood.' 'Keep the things' should be 'keep things' (article unnecessary). 'The environment becomes. Have.' is incorrect word order and verb use; likely meant 'the environment becomes better' or 'the environment is better.' Use present simple for current habit ('I like', 'it helps'), and correct sentence structure and word choice for clarity.