Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve grammar and sentence structure: use past tense consistently, correct verb forms and pluralization. Make the response more concise and natural with one clear topic sentence followed by 1–2 supporting details. Use linking words (for example, because, and) appropriately.

예시: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks as a child. I liked doing outdoor activities such as running and biking, and my family often went to the park with me, so we could play games together.

제안: Make your answer more coherent and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then explain why parks are useful for your architecture studies with specific examples. Fix grammar (subject-verb agreement, articles) and avoid repeating phrases.

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they help with my architecture studies. For example, I often sketch buildings and people there to study proportions and materials, which improves my design ideas.

제안: Provide a clear opinion with reasons and correct vocabulary. Use linking words (because, so) and correct place names/words (parks). Be specific about limitations and give a brief consequence or suggestion.

예시: Yes, I would like to see more parks in Seoul because there are relatively few green spaces in many neighborhoods. As a result, people have to travel far to relax, so adding smaller local parks would make outdoor activities more accessible.

제안: Clarify your meaning and correct confusing phrases. Begin with a direct answer naming the park, then explain why with specific details about what you want to see (e.g., High Line’s design, relationship to the city). Remove unclear words like "career" and use correct terms (High Line, linear park).

예시: Yes. I would like to visit the High Line in New York City because it is a famous linear park built on an old railway. I want to study how its elevated walkway integrates greenery into the urban fabric and inspires new public spaces.

× I really liked go to pars when I was a child because I love doing activities outdoor like running, biking and my family were also went together to park and play together.

✓ I really liked going to parks when I was a child because I loved doing outdoor activities like running and biking, and my family also went to the park to play together.

The verb after 'liked' should be in the -ing form (gerund). 'pars' is misspelled and should be 'parks' (plural). 'love' should match past context 'liked' so use 'loved'. 'doing activities outdoor' needs correct adjective order: 'outdoor activities'. 'were also went' is incorrect: use simple past 'also went'. Remove redundant 'together'. Suggestions: use gerunds after enjoy/like/love for past context match tenses consistently.

× Yeah, of course it's because related to my major.

✓ Yeah, of course it's because it is related to my major.

The clause needs an explicit subject and verb: 'it is related' rather than just 'related'. Ensure sentences have a subject and a finite verb to be grammatically complete.

× You know that architecture is very important to draw something, to experience my opinion.

✓ You know that architecture is very important for drawing and for expressing my ideas.

Infinitive 'to draw something' is awkward here; use 'for' + gerund to express purpose. 'to experience my opinion' is incorrect; use 'expressing my ideas' to convey intended meaning. Maintain parallel structure: 'for drawing and for expressing'.

× So I usually go to park and draw something and draw people in there and also I draw architecture too.

✓ So I usually go to the park and draw things and people there, and I also draw buildings.

Use article 'the' with 'park' for a specific location. 'draw something' is vague; 'draw things' or specific 'draw people' works. Avoid repetition 'draw ... and also I draw'; combine with 'and I also draw'. Use 'buildings' or 'architecture' as a noun; 'draw architecture' is acceptable but 'draw buildings' is clearer. Maintain natural word order.

× yes, I really want because I think in Seoul there's not enough parts in there so I usually go Hang, but that's that's all.

✓ Yes, I really do because I think in Seoul there aren't enough parks, so I usually go to Hangang, but that's all.

Capitalization at start. 'want' needs object; use 'I really do' or 'I really want more'. 'parts' is incorrect word; should be 'parks'. Use 'there aren't' for plural 'parks'. 'go Hang' needs preposition 'go to Hangang' (name of river park). Remove duplicate 'that's'.

× There's no the other parts I can find so I know some park enough.

✓ There are no other parks I can find, so I don't know many parks well enough.

'There's no the other parts' is ungrammatical: use 'There are no other parks'. Match plural with 'are'. 'I know some park enough' is unclear; intended meaning is likely 'I don't know many parks well enough'. Use negative or clarify knowledge level.

× Actually that's that's not career.

✓ Actually, that's not my plan/career.

The phrase is unclear; likely meaning is 'that's not my career' or 'that's not related to my career/plan'. Add possessive 'my' and choose correct noun: 'career' or 'plan'. Ensure clarity.

× I want to go to New York City to go to Highland Park.

✓ I want to go to New York City to visit High Line Park.

Proper name likely 'High Line' (linear park) rather than 'Highland Park'. Use 'visit' rather than repeated 'go to'. Use correct park name and capitalization to be precise.

× You know that Highland Park is very famous in architecture too.

✓ You know that the High Line is also very famous for its architecture.

Use 'famous for' rather than 'famous in'. Include definite article 'the' with 'High Line'. 'Architecture' should be referenced with 'for' to indicate reason for fame.

× I want to experience the linear park is penetrating the city because there is no smart park, no linear parks.

✓ I want to experience how a linear park penetrates the city because there are no innovative linear parks where I live.

Original sentence is a run-on and has incorrect clause structure. Use 'how' to introduce the clause 'how a linear park penetrates the city'. Use plural agreement 'there are no ... parks'. 'smart park' is ambiguous; 'innovative' clarifies meaning. Ensure subject-verb agreement and clearer vocabulary.