Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Improve grammatical accuracy, clarity and conciseness. Start with a clear topic sentence, correct tense and reduce filler words. Use one or two specific supporting details linked with a connector (e.g., because, and).

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because they gave me chances to make friends and play games like hide-and-seek. For example, I often met neighborhood children there and we would spend afternoons playing until sunset.

제안: Give a direct answer first, then give a clear reason with correct grammar and linking words. Avoid vague phrases and repetition. Use present simple to describe current habits and include a specific example or contrast.

예시: Not really. In my city there are very few well-maintained parks, so I rarely visit them now. For instance, the nearest park is poorly kept and crowded, so I usually exercise at home instead.

제안: Answer directly and organize reasons logically using linking words (for example, because, and, so). Be specific about benefits and avoid unclear words. Use concrete examples of benefits for people and the environment.

예시: Yes, I would. More green spaces would improve people's wellbeing because they provide shade, places to relax and space for exercise. For example, a new park could host morning tai chi classes and give children a safe place to play.

제안: Start with a clear statement of your intention, then give specific details and correct phrases (e.g., "a park in Singapore called..." or "a park near the bay"). If you don't know the exact name, describe it precisely and explain why you want to visit.

예시: Yes, I would like to visit Gardens by the Bay in Singapore. It has many different types of trees and flower displays, and I want to see the famous Supertree Grove and the flower domes in person.

× Umm, yes, when I was a shy, I enjoy going out to the park a lot because it's aware we can make a lot of friends, we can play hide and seek and I really have a lot, had a lot of fun like at that moment.

✓ Umm, yes, when I was shy, I enjoyed going to the park a lot because we could make a lot of friends, play hide-and-seek, and I had a lot of fun then.

The sentence uses 'a shy' incorrectly (article + adjective) and mixes tenses and adverbial forms. 'Shy' should not have 'a' because it is an adjective describing the subject. The speaker refers to childhood, so past tense is required: 'enjoy' -> 'enjoyed' and 'have/had' should be consistently past: 'had a lot of fun'. 'It's aware' is ungrammatical and likely meant 'we could'. Also use 'then' for that time and hyphenate 'hide-and-seek'. Suggestion: remove the article before adjectives, use past tense for past situations, and simplify clauses for clarity.

× Umm to be honest around my area which is a city they were not a lot of parks like a good one.

✓ Umm, to be honest, in my area, which is a city, there are not a lot of good parks.

The original has incorrect subject-verb agreement and word order: 'they were not a lot of parks' mixes a plural pronoun with 'were' and awkward phrasing. Use 'there are not a lot of good parks' to state existence in the present. Also use 'in my area' not 'around my area'. Suggestion: use 'there is/are' for existence and match verb number to the noun ('parks' -> 'are').

× So from now on like I really not going to the park anymore and being more indoor person.

✓ So from now on, I'm really not going to the park anymore and will be more of an indoors person.

The sentence mixes present participle forms and omits auxiliary verbs. For a planned change starting now, use present continuous or 'going to' future: 'I'm not going' or 'I will be'. Also 'being more indoor person' is incorrect adjective use — use 'indoors person' or 'indoor person' with article: 'more of an indoors person'. Suggestion: include the auxiliary 'am' and use consistent tense ('will be' or 'I'm going to be') and correct noun/adjective form.

× Umm yes of course more green could like could provide us a lot of energy and shadows and climb relax wide for people who live around.

✓ Umm, yes of course more green spaces could provide us with more energy, shade, and relaxing areas for people who live nearby.

Problems include adjective/adverb misuse and awkward nouns: 'more green' should be 'more green spaces' or 'more greenery'. 'Shadows' is better as 'shade', and 'climb relax wide' is ungrammatical—likely intended 'places to relax' or 'wide relaxing areas'. 'Provide us a lot of energy' should be 'provide us with more energy'. Suggestion: use correct collocations ('green spaces', 'shade', 'areas to relax') and the preposition 'with' after 'provide'.

× I believe that could benefit to the society a lot if we have more parks.

✓ I believe that could benefit society a lot if we have more parks.

Use of 'to' after 'benefit' is incorrect in this context; 'benefit society' (no preposition) is the correct collocation. Also 'the society' is unnatural here—use 'society' without 'the' for general meaning. Suggestion: remove the preposition 'to' and drop the definite article.

× Umm yes, for specifically it's located locate in Singapore is.

✓ Umm yes, specifically it's located in Singapore.

The original duplicates words and uses incorrect word order: 'for specifically' and 'locate in' are wrong. Use 'specifically' before the clause and 'located in Singapore' is the correct prepositional phrase. Suggestion: avoid redundant words and use 'located in' for places.

× I'm not quite sure for the name but it's a Bay, consists of different type of trees and flowers.

✓ I'm not quite sure of the name, but it's a bay that has many different types of trees and flowers.

Problems: 'not quite sure for the name' should be 'not quite sure of the name' (preposition choice). 'it's a Bay, consists of' is a comma splice and missing relative pronoun—use 'a bay that has' or 'which consists of'. 'Different type' should be plural 'different types'. Suggestion: use correct prepositions ('sure of'), join clauses properly with 'that' or a relative clause, and pluralize 'types'.

× So one day I would like to visit there.

✓ So one day I would like to visit it.

Use of 'there' after 'visit' is less natural; 'visit it' or 'visit that place' is preferred. The tense 'would like to' is fine for a future desire, but the object needs to be correct. Suggestion: use 'visit it' or 'visit there' only with an appropriate preposition (e.g., 'go there' or 'visit it').