Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and grammatical. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Use correct tense and articles, and avoid repetition. Limit to 3–4 sentences and use linking words like “because” or “for example.”

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because they were places where I could play with other children and relax. For example, I often had picnics under the shade of a big tree and played games with friends. Those outings were a highlight of my weekends.

제안: Correct grammar and make the reason clearer and more natural. Use a topic sentence followed by a reason, and include a linking word (“because” or “so”). Keep it to 2–3 sentences and correct verb forms and quantifiers.

예시: Not really. Since we moved out of the city, it takes me about thirty minutes to get to the nearest park, so I rarely go there. If access were easier, I would visit more often.

제안: Clarify your opinion and use appropriate vocabulary. Avoid vague or invented terms like “Marvel Parks.” Provide a clear reason and one specific benefit of more parks. Use linking words such as “because” or “so.”

예시: Yes, I would. My city is crowded with buildings and heavy traffic, so adding more parks would help reduce air pollution and provide green spaces for people to relax. For example, small neighborhood parks could improve air quality and encourage outdoor exercise.

제안: Make the answer grammatical and slightly more specific. Begin with a clear statement, then give one or two concrete plans or reasons. Use correct verb forms and avoid informal fillers like “kinda.”

예시: I don't have a specific park in mind at the moment, but if I find a nice green space I would visit to relax and enjoy the view. I would like to lie on the grass, watch the sky, and take a short break from my routine.

× Yes. And it's not just I like them, but I love them.

✓ Yes. It's not just that I liked them, I loved them.

The original sentence uses awkward pronoun/clause structure. 'It's not just I like them' is ungrammatical; add 'that' to introduce the clause and match tense: the question asks about childhood, so past tense 'liked'/'loved' is appropriate. Also combine clauses for fluency.

× I love going to the parks, especially when I was young where I could play with other kids or even eat that under the shade of the tree.

✓ I loved going to parks, especially when I was young, when I could play with other kids or even eat under the shade of a tree.

Article misuse and tense problems: 'the parks' is too specific; 'parks' (no article) is natural. The clause should be past tense 'loved' to match 'when I was young'. 'Eat that' is incorrect—remove 'that'. 'the shade of the tree' is overly specific; use 'the shade of a tree' or 'a tree'. Also improve clause order and punctuation for clarity.

× And I love how.

✓ And I loved that feeling.

This fragment lacks an object and is incomplete. The question refers to childhood, so use past tense 'loved'. Provide a noun phrase 'that feeling' to complete the sentence and make the meaning clear.

× Ever since we moved from the city, I don't like going to the parks now since it's such so much hassle to go there.

✓ Ever since we moved out of the city, I don't like going to parks now because it's such a hassle to get there.

Multiple issues: preposition 'from' should be 'out of' for moving away. 'the parks' should be 'parks' (general). 'such so much' is redundant; use 'such a hassle' or 'so much of a hassle'. Also 'to go there' is okay but 'to get there' is more natural. Tense 'don't like' is fine for current preference.

× It will took me 30 minutes or so.

✓ It takes me about 30 minutes or so.

Mixing future auxiliary 'will' with past tense 'took' is incorrect. For a habitual present duration, use simple present 'takes'. Use 'about' for approximation; 'or so' is optional.

× Yes, to be honest the city where I live is kind of bustled with buildings and traffics so I always think that Marvel Parks will be applicable here since it is kinda polluted now.

✓ Yes, to be honest, the city where I live is quite crowded with buildings and traffic, so I always think that more parks would be appropriate here since it is a bit polluted now.

'Bustled' is an adjective meaning busy but not correct in 'bustled with buildings'; use 'crowded with' or 'filled with'. 'Traffics' is uncountable: use 'traffic'. 'Marvel Parks' seems incorrect—likely 'more parks'. 'Will be applicable' is awkward; 'would be appropriate' fits a suggestion. 'Kinda' is informal; use 'a bit' or 'somewhat'.

× I actually don't have in mind but if ever I see one I will try to go there and just took a breather.

✓ I actually don't have any particular park in mind, but if I see one I will try to go there and just take a breather.

Missing object 'any particular park' after 'don't have in mind'. 'If ever I see one' is nonstandard; use 'if I see one'. 'Just took a breather' mixes past tense 'took' with future 'will'; use base form 'take' after 'will'.

× Appreciate the view and I'm kinda want to play on the grass while watching the sky.

✓ I would appreciate the view, and I kind of want to play on the grass while watching the sky.

Sentence fragments and pronoun/verb issues: 'Appreciate the view' lacks subject—add 'I would'. 'I'm kinda want' mixes 'I'm' with 'want'; use 'I kind of want' or 'I'd like to'. Also replace 'kinda' with 'kind of' for conversational correctness.