Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be clearer and more concise. Start with a direct topic sentence that answers the question, then give one or two specific supporting details connected by a linking word. Avoid hesitations and repeated words, and correct or simplify unclear phrases (e.g., "Charhol times").

예시: Yes, I enjoyed going to parks as a child. For example, I often visited a park near my home with my mother where I could read in the small library and play on the swings, which helped me relax and learn. Additionally, those visits made me feel safe and happy.

제안: Answer directly and organize ideas with linking words. Use clear time expressions and a reason or example. Reduce repetition and use correct grammar for general statements (e.g., "parks are beneficial").

예시: Yes, I still like going to parks. I usually go in the morning and evening to exercise because parks are peaceful and help me refresh my mind and body. For instance, I walk for thirty minutes most mornings to stay fit.

제안: Give a clear opinion first, then support it with a specific reason and an example. Avoid unclear phrases and fill words. If mentioning a specific park, describe one or two clear features that make it special.

예시: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because they provide green space and places for people to relax. For example, Brinda Park is popular because it has wide walking paths and a playground, so I often visit it with friends.

제안: Answer directly naming the park, then give a specific reason and a short personal plan using linking words. Keep it natural and avoid repeating phrases. Correct the park name consistently (Vrindra or Brinda).

예시: Yes, I would like to visit Vrindra Park in the future because I have heard it has beautiful gardens and long walking trails. I plan to go there next month to walk and take photos with my friends.

× When I was in Charhol times, I went there once a time with my mother and, uh, I had no worries about this park at that time.

✓ When I was a child in Charhol, I went there once with my mother and I had no worries about the park then.

The sentence has multiple structure problems: incorrect time phrase 'in Charhol times' should be 'when I was a child in Charhol'; 'once a time' is incorrect and should be 'once' or 'one time'; unnecessary filler 'uh' removed; redundant 'at that time' simplified to 'then'. Suggestion: simplify time phrases and remove fillers to make the sentence clear and grammatical. Grammar problem type ID:26

× I just thought from this park for learning the life long learnings, the library and uh, it's, it is, uh, it was beneficial for me at that time.

✓ I thought this park and its library helped me learn lifelong lessons, and it was beneficial to me then.

Phrase 'thought from this park for learning the life long learnings' is ungrammatical; 'lifelong lessons' is the correct noun phrase; repeated hesitations and tense confusion ('it's, it is, uh, it was') should be unified to past 'it was' to match 'I thought'. Suggestion: use clear noun phrases like 'lifelong lessons' and keep verb tenses consistent. Grammar problem type ID:26

× Yes, I want to go back for doing the exercise at evening and morning time.

✓ Yes, I want to go back to do exercise in the morning and evening.

Use 'go back to do' rather than 'go back for doing'; 'at evening and morning time' should be 'in the morning and evening'. Suggestion: use 'to do' after verbs of intention and standard prepositions for times ('in the morning/evening'). Grammar problem type ID:8

× Some people use the park once a time for walking in their life and parks has a great beneficial to keep your fresh mind and your body so it will be helpful for yourself.

✓ Some people use the park occasionally for walking, and parks are very beneficial for keeping your mind fresh and your body healthy, so they are helpful.

'Once a time' is incorrect; use 'occasionally' or 'once in a while'. 'Parks has' is wrong subject-verb agreement; should be 'parks are'. 'A great beneficial' is ungrammatical; use 'very beneficial'. Pronoun 'yourself' mismatches general statement; use 'they' or 'people'. Suggestion: correct quantifiers and agreement, and choose appropriate pronouns for general statements. Grammar problem type ID:14

× I have no, I have no scene yet to all the parks in my life.

✓ I have not seen all the parks in my city yet.

'I have no scene' is incorrect; should be present perfect 'I have not seen'. 'To all the parks in my life' is incorrect preposition and noun choice; use 'all the parks in my city' or 'in my life' depending on meaning. Suggestion: use 'seen' for experience and correct prepositions ('in'). Grammar problem type ID:26

× So I like the park. Brinda Park is very distinguished park, uh, in all over the city.

✓ I like Brinda Park. Brinda Park is a very well-known park in the city.

'Very distinguished park' is awkward; 'well-known' or 'famous' is more natural. 'In all over the city' misuses prepositions; use 'in the city' or 'throughout the city'. Remove filler 'uh'. Suggestion: choose natural adjectives and correct prepositional phrases. Grammar problem type ID:13

× And, uh, so I like the sparks once a time.

✓ So I like visiting the park sometimes.

'Sparks' is likely a mispronunciation of 'parks' or 'Brinda Park'; 'once a time' should be 'sometimes' or 'once in a while'. Remove filler 'uh'. Suggestion: use standard adverbs of frequency. Grammar problem type ID:26

× Why? And I visited with my friends and, uh, this park is a very great source to enhance.

✓ I visited it with my friends, and this park is a great place to relax and improve well-being.

'Why?' is out of place; clarify reason. 'This park is a very great source to enhance' is incomplete—enhance what? Provide the object, e.g., 'relax and improve well-being'. Remove 'uh'. Suggestion: complete the idea and use appropriate verbs and nouns. Grammar problem type ID:26

× I have AI have a more choice to use to all park in my life when I had decided to use the park for future that the park name is Vrindra Park.

✓ I would like to use more parks in the future; the park I chose is Vrindra Park.

Sentence contains many errors: 'I have AI have a more choice' is unintelligible; wrong tense 'had decided' should be future or conditional depending on meaning. Simplify to a clear statement of future preference and name the park. Suggestion: use 'would like' or 'will' for future intentions and keep sentence concise. Grammar problem type ID:26

× Vrindra Park is a very great park for each one.

✓ Vrindra Park is a great park for everyone.

'A very great' is unnatural; 'great' or 'very good' suffice. 'For each one' should be 'for everyone'. Suggestion: use common idiomatic expressions like 'for everyone'. Grammar problem type ID:13

× Every person give to response this park in in their life so I liked it very much for walking.

✓ Everyone has positive memories of this park in their life, so I like it very much for walking.

'Every person give to response this park' is ungrammatical; use 'has positive memories' or 'responds positively'. Duplicate 'in in' corrected. Tense consistency: 'liked' to 'like' if current preference. Suggestion: express the idea with correct verbs and consistent tense. Grammar problem type ID:26