Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Give a direct, grammatically correct response and add one brief specific reason or memory. Avoid tense errors and redundancy. Use one or two supporting details linked with a simple connector (e.g., because, and).

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because I enjoyed playing on the swings and meeting friends there.

제안: Make sentences grammatically correct and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details linked logically. Avoid vague or confusing tense usage and repetition.

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because I like watching children play; their joyful energy cheers me up when I feel stressed.

제안: Respond directly and correct basic grammar (subject-verb agreement, article use). Provide one specific reason or consequence and use a linking word (because, so). Keep it concise.

예시: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because they give me a peaceful place to relax and exercise.

제안: Use correct verb forms and clearer phrasing. Give a concise topic sentence and one specific reason why you want to visit, linked with a connector. Avoid awkward expressions like “at least once a lifetime.”

예시: Yes, I definitely plan to visit Global Village because I want to experience its cultural pavilions and international food.

× Yeah, I love going to parks as a child.

✓ Yeah, I loved going to parks as a child.

The sentence refers to a past time ('as a child'), so the present simple 'love' is inconsistent. Use past simple 'loved' to match the time frame. Suggestion: match verb tense to the time expression (past).

× Yeah, I still love to go to park because I love to see children playing, the joyful faces of the kids and they feel very happy.

✓ Yeah, I still love to go to parks because I love to see children playing, their joyful faces, and how happy they are.

Multiple issues: 'to park' should be plural 'to parks' (common noun count and idiomatic usage) and 'they feel very happy' is awkward; use 'how happy they are' or 'and how happy they look'. Also 'the joyful faces of the kids' is better as 'their joyful faces' for conciseness. Ensure consistent present tense 'still love'. This fits currently (present).

× When I was not, my mind was not OK.

✓ When I was a child, my mind was not okay.

The original fragment 'When I was not' is incomplete and unclear. Likely meaning is 'When I was a child' or 'When I was younger'. Replace with a clear time clause. Also use 'okay' for naturalness. Keep past tense 'was'. Suggestion: provide a clear time reference after 'When I was...'.

× I will go to park and just observe that kids and their innocence and happiness that make me more happy.

✓ I will go to parks and just observe the kids, and their innocence and happiness make me happier.

Several issues: 'go to park' should be 'go to parks' (idiomatic/plural) or 'go to the park' (definite article). 'Observe that kids' is incorrect: use 'observe the kids'. 'That make me more happy' has a relative clause error and awkward comparative; use 'make me happier'. Maintain future tense 'will go' but correct noun and clause structures. Suggestion: choose 'the park' for a specific park or 'parks' generally.

× Yeah, I love to see more parks in my city because I'm a person who like parks very much and I feel very happy or peaceful when I go to a pack.

✓ Yeah, I'd love to see more parks in my city because I'm a person who likes parks very much, and I feel very happy and peaceful when I go to a park.

Errors: 'I love to see' is acceptable but 'I'd love to see' is more natural for desires. Subject-verb agreement: 'who like' should be 'who likes' (third person singular agreement with 'who' referring to 'I' as a person? Better rephrase: 'I'm a person who likes'). 'a pack' is a typo for 'a park'. Also 'happy or peaceful' should be 'happy and peaceful' for clarity. Suggestion: ensure subject-verb agreement and fix typos.

× Yeah, I would definitely planning to go to the global village.

✓ Yeah, I would definitely plan to go to the Global Village.

After 'would' use the base verb 'plan', not the -ing form 'planning'. 'Would definitely plan' expresses intention. Also capitalize 'Global Village' as a proper noun. Suggestion: use correct verb form after modal 'would'.

× That was one of my dream to visit that global village at least once a lifetime.

✓ That was one of my dreams: to visit the Global Village at least once in my lifetime.

Errors: 'one of my dream' should be plural 'one of my dreams'. 'To visit that global village' is better as 'to visit the Global Village' (proper noun) and 'at least once a lifetime' should be 'at least once in my lifetime'. Use past tense 'was' is okay if referring to a past desire; keep consistency. Suggestion: correct noun plurality and prepositional phrase 'in my lifetime'.