Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more grammatically accurate and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence (e.g., "Yes, I loved going to parks as a child."), avoid fillers (uh) and redundant phrases, and add one or two specific supporting details using a linking word (e.g., "because"). Keep to 2–3 sentences.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because they were a fun place to meet my friends. We usually went in the evenings after school, and my mother allowed us to play on the swings and slides until dinner.

제안: Organize the answer with a clear topic sentence and correct tenses. Avoid repetition and fillers. Use a linking word to explain frequency or conditions (e.g., "but if I have free time"). Limit to 2–3 concise sentences and give a specific example of what you do in the park.

예시: I still like going to parks, but I don't have much free time at the moment. If I have free time on weekends, I visit a nearby park to walk, read, or relax on a bench with friends.

제안: Give a direct answer and support it with specific reasons using linking words (e.g., "because", "for example"). Remove hesitations and repetitive phrases. Mention particular benefits (green space, playgrounds, exercise) to be specific.

예시: Yes, definitely — I would like more parks in my city because they provide green space and safe places for children to play. For example, new parks could include playgrounds and walking paths, which would improve residents' health and quality of life.

제안: Answer clearly with correct grammar and avoid repeating phrases. Use linking words (e.g., "because", "so") to explain why you want to visit and include concrete details about the park. Keep it to 2–3 concise sentences.

예시: Yes, there is a park I want to visit that is a bit far from my hometown because it is a futuristic park with an outdoor gym. I would like to try the gym equipment and explore the modern landscaping and installations there.

× Yes of course I love to go playground when I was a younger, especially in evening time when we are free from school and tuition.

✓ Yes, of course I loved going to the playground when I was younger, especially in the evenings when we were free from school and tuition.

The student mixes present and past tenses and omits articles/inflection. The action refers to childhood (past), so use past tense 'loved' and past continuous/habit 'going'. Use the article 'the' before 'playground' and 'younger' should be 'younger' with 'was' (I was younger). Use plural 'evenings' for habitual times and change 'are' to 'were' to match past timeframe. Suggestion: Decide timeframe (past) then keep verbs and time expressions consistent.

× That time uh moms allow us to go and enjoy with the friends.

✓ At that time our moms allowed us to go and enjoy with friends.

'Moms' as plural requires plural verb 'allowed', but the sentence refers to a past habitual event so past 'allowed' is correct. Also add possessive 'our' and remove unnecessary article before 'friends'. Suggestion: Use 'our moms' and past verb 'allowed' to match past context.

× When, uh, now, uh, when, uh, now, now I don't have, uh, much time to go to visit a park, but, uh, if I have some free time, uh, free time, then I went to, I go to park and, uh, spend some, my quality time here.

✓ Now I don't have much time to visit a park, but if I have some free time, I go to the park and spend some quality time there.

The original mixes tenses ('went' past with 'don't have' present) and has extra filler words and missing articles. Keep present tense for current habits: 'don't have', 'if I have', 'I go'. Use the article 'the' before 'park' and 'there' to show location. Remove repetitions and fillers. Suggestion: Simplify to one clear present-tense conditional structure.

× Uh, yes, uh, definitely I want to see the more park in my city and because of this is the only place where you, where, where you will sit and, uh, enjoy the, the view and especially for the children.

✓ Yes, definitely I want to see more parks in my city because these are the only places where you can sit and enjoy the view, especially for children.

'the more park' is incorrect: use 'more parks' (plural) or 'another park'. 'Because of this is' is ungrammatical; use 'because these are' to match plural. Use modal 'can' for ability and remove extra 'the' before 'view' and 'the children'. Suggestion: Use plural 'parks' and clear clause 'because these are the only places'.

× Uh, they, especially for the children, they, they visit there and they played there.

✓ Children often visited and played there.

The sentence mixes present 'visit' and past 'played'. For describing habitual past activity use simple past 'visited' and 'played'. Also remove redundant pronouns. Suggestion: Use concise past-tense sentences for past habits.

× Yes uh, there is one park in my city, but it's uh far from my hometown, but uh, I want to visit there.

✓ Yes, there is one park in my city, but it's far from my home, and I want to visit it.

'Visit there' is nonnative; use 'visit it' or 'visit there' is less natural. Also 'hometown' and 'city' used together; 'far from my home' is clearer. Use 'and' instead of repeating 'but'. Suggestion: Use 'visit it' to refer back to the park and choose consistent noun for residence.

× I hear about this park.

✓ I have heard about this park.

When reporting prior news or information known up to now, use present perfect 'have heard' rather than simple present 'hear'. Suggestion: Use present perfect to indicate past experience with current relevance.

× This one is futuristic park and there is a outdoor gym as well so I as outdoor gym as well.

✓ This is a futuristic park and there is an outdoor gym as well, so I want to see the outdoor gym.

Missing article before 'futuristic park' (use 'a') and incorrect 'a outdoor' should be 'an outdoor'. The original repeats phrases and lacks a main verb in the final clause; add 'want to see'. Suggestion: Use correct indefinite articles ('a' vs 'an') and avoid repetition; include a clear verb.