Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be clearer and more grammatical: start with a direct topic sentence, then add one or two specific supporting details using linking words. Avoid repetition and incorrect phrases (e.g., "therefore hour", "a lot to a lot of steam"). Focus on past tense consistency and accurate word choice.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. For example, my brother and I would play football there almost every weekend because the park had plenty of open space. Also, we often ran along the trails and explored the small stream nearby, which made being outdoors really exciting.

제안: Good content and clear opinion, but fix minor grammar and clarity issues. Use one topic sentence, then add a linked reason and a brief contrast with correct expressions (e.g., "as often as I'd like" and "busy schedule").

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they help me relax and get fresh air. However, I don't visit them as often as I'd like due to my busy schedule, so I usually go only on weekends or when I need a break from work.

제안: Answer is relevant but contains vocabulary and grammar mistakes ("parts" → "parks"). Use a clear topic sentence expressing your view, then support with specific reasons or examples using linking words like "because" or "for example."

예시: Yes, I would like to see more parks in the city because they offer places for exercise and family gatherings. For example, new parks could host local events and provide safe green spaces where children can play and people can walk or cycle.

제안: Nice specific example and clear reasons. Improve accuracy and natural phrasing: use correct collocations ("rent rowboats", "look forward to relaxing/strolling") and keep sentences concise. Use one or two linked supporting details.

예시: Yes, I would love to visit Parque del Retiro in Madrid because it has a large lake where you can rent rowboats. I look forward to strolling through the gardens and relaxing while enjoying the scenery.

× We often play football therefore hour because we saw plenty of space and we loved being outdoors.

✓ We often played football for hours because we had plenty of space and we loved being outdoors.

The sentence mixes present tense 'play' with past context; use past tense 'played' for habitual past actions. 'Therefore hour' is incorrect phrase; replace with 'for hours' to indicate duration. Also 'saw plenty of space' is unnatural; use 'had plenty of space' to express possession in the past.

× We used to run a lot to a lot of steam.

✓ We used to run around a lot and let off steam.

Original sentence is ungrammatical and unclear. 'Run a lot to a lot of steam' is incorrect structure. 'Run around a lot' is idiomatic for being active, and 'let off steam' correctly conveys releasing energy; combine them with 'and' for clarity.

× I really enjoy spending my time in outdoor spaces and urban parks are great options in the city because they let me relax and get some fresh air.

✓ I really enjoy spending time in outdoor spaces, and urban parks are great options in the city because they let me relax and get some fresh air.

Sentence mostly correct but redundant 'my' in 'spending my time' is unnecessary; 'spending time' is more natural. Added a comma before the coordinating conjunction for readability. Tenses are consistent present.

× However, I don't visit them as often I'd like to my busy shuttle.

✓ However, I don't visit them as often as I'd like because of my busy schedule.

The phrase 'as often I'd like' is missing 'as' after 'often'. 'my busy shuttle' is incorrect word choice; 'busy schedule' is correct. Add 'because of' to explain reason.

× I appreciate the city's redevelopment because it helps the economy, but having more parts would be great for outdoor activities.

✓ I appreciate the city's redevelopment because it helps the economy, but having more parks would be great for outdoor activities.

The word 'parts' is a typo or wrong word; 'parks' is the correct noun. Adjective use is fine; replacing the incorrect noun fixes the meaning.

× For example, parks will provide space for exercise, family picnics, local events.

✓ For example, parks provide space for exercise, family picnics, and local events.

Using 'will provide' is grammatically acceptable but present simple 'provide' is preferable when stating general benefits. Added 'and' before final item for proper list structure.

× Yes, I would like to visit the well known Parque del Retiro in Madrid because it has a large lake where you can rent row boats.

✓ Yes, I would like to visit the well-known Parque del Retiro in Madrid because it has a large lake where you can rent rowboats.

Hyphenate 'well-known' when used as a compound adjective before a noun. 'Row boats' is more commonly written as the single word 'rowboats'. Grammar otherwise correct.

× I think I will be relaxing to stroll through the gardens and enjoy the scenery.

✓ I think I will stroll through the gardens and relax to enjoy the scenery.

Original uses 'will be relaxing to stroll', which is unidiomatic: 'relaxing' cannot govern the infinitive 'to stroll'. Rephrase to 'will stroll... and relax' or 'will be relaxing as I stroll'. The correction keeps future tense and expresses sequence of actions clearly.