Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Cải thiện: Trả lời cần tự nhiên và chính xác hơn; tránh dùng từ không phù hợp (ví dụ “funny” sai nghĩa) và rút gọn câu; thêm câu chủ đề rõ ràng và một chi tiết cụ thể. Cụ thể: dùng từ phù hợp như “fun” hoặc “enjoyable”, nêu lý do ví dụ trò chơi, không miêu tả mơ hồ. Hãy giữ không quá 3-4 câu.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child because they were fun places to play. For example, I enjoyed swinging on the swings and playing hide-and-seek with my friends.

제안: Cải thiện: Tránh lặp từ và tiếng ấp úng; dùng cấu trúc trực tiếp và từ vựng chính xác (ví dụ “fresh air” thay cho “qualified air”); thêm một chi tiết cụ thể và từ nối để mạch lạc. Giữ tối đa 3 câu và nói rõ tần suất hoặc hoạt động bạn làm ở công viên.

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because they offer fresh air and a peaceful environment. For instance, I often walk there in the mornings to exercise and relax.

제안: Cải thiện: Tránh vấp và sửa ngữ pháp (singular/plural: “a great idea”); trình bày ý một cách mạch lạc với liên từ phù hợp (e.g. “because” + reason); đưa thêm kết quả hoặc ví dụ cụ thể (ví dụ: cải thiện sức khỏe cộng đồng). Giữ 2-3 câu rõ ràng.

예시: Yes, I think it's a great idea to build more parks because they provide clean air and a peaceful atmosphere. As a result, they can improve people's physical and mental health.

제안: Cải thiện: Trả lời cần rõ ràng về tên hoặc loại công viên (ví dụ: a wildlife park, a national park); tránh nói lắp và hoàn chỉnh mô tả (ví dụ “beautiful scenery”); thêm lý do cụ thể vì sao muốn đến (động vật, phong cảnh, hoạt động). Giữ tối đa 3-4 câu mạch lạc.

예시: I would like to visit a wildlife park in the future because it has many different animals and beautiful scenery. I am interested in seeing native species and taking nature walks there.

× Yes, I really like going to the parks because it's very funny and fantastic.

✓ Yes, I really liked going to parks because it was very fun and fantastic.

Original uses present tense 'like' but the question asks about childhood (past). Change to past tense 'liked' and 'was'. 'Funny' is incorrect collocation for enjoyable place; use 'fun'. Remove 'the' before 'parks' because speaking generally about parks doesn't need the definite article.

× Now, I still like going to the parks because it's uh, because in the park have many special things like, uh, qualified air.

✓ Now, I still like going to parks because there are many special things in the park, such as clean air.

Tense is present which is correct, but sentence structure is incorrect. Use 'there are' for existence (There be issue but listed under present tense). Remove 'the' when speaking generally or keep 'the park' consistently; 'in the park have' is ungrammatical—use 'there are'. 'Qualified air' is wrong collocation; use 'clean air'. Also simplify filler words.

× Yes, it's a great ideas because umm, part, hey part helps people, uh, help people have uh, clean and uh, fresh air and peaceful atmosphere.

✓ Yes, it's a great idea because parks help people have clean, fresh air and a peaceful atmosphere.

Mismatch: 'a great ideas' mixes singular article with plural noun; change to 'a great idea'. 'part' is mispronunciation of 'park' and singular/plural: use plural 'parks' if general, or singular 'the park'. Add article 'a' before 'peaceful atmosphere'. Combine duplicate phrases and remove fillers.

× I want to go to late part in the future because it has many, uh, animals and uh, have and has a, uh, beautiful.

✓ I want to go to the large park in the future because it has many animals and is beautiful.

Multiple issues: 'late part' seems to be wrong words—likely 'large park'. Sentence structure 'has many animals and have and has a ... beautiful' is ungrammatical. Use parallel structure: 'has many animals and is beautiful.' Maintain future tense intention with 'want to go' which is fine.