Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct tense usage; start with a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, fix grammatical errors and complete sentences. Add one specific detail about a favorite activity and use a linking word to connect ideas.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often went there with my older sister, and we played on the swings and climbed trees every evening until about 7:00 PM. However, we could not go out when it rained, so rainy days were disappointing.

제안: Improve coherence by combining sentences, correcting tense and word choice, and limiting redundancy. Use linking words (for example, 'because' or 'so') and add one specific example of what you enjoy watching or seeing to enrich the answer.

예시: Yes, I still enjoy going to parks because walking there after work helps me relax. For example, I like watching families and joggers while enjoying the greenery, which makes me feel peaceful and recharged.

제안: Provide a clear topic sentence, avoid repetition, and finish thoughts. Offer a specific suggestion or reason why more parks are needed and use linking words to explain consequences or benefits.

예시: Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because urban development has reduced green spaces. For instance, more parks would improve air quality and provide places for families to exercise and relax, so city planners should protect open areas when approving new buildings.

제안: Avoid repetition and correct small errors (e.g., 'on the list' not 'on the lease'). Start with a direct statement, give a reason why you want to visit, and add a linking phrase about your plans.

예시: Yes, I would love to visit Central Park in New York because I want to see its famous landscapes and take photos. In fact, I'm planning a trip next year, so Central Park is at the top of my list and I hope to spend an afternoon exploring and photographing the sights.

× As a child, I really love going to the parks.

✓ As a child, I really loved going to the parks.

The speaker refers to a past habitual action ('as a child'), so the verb should be in the past tense. Use 'loved' instead of 'love' to match the time frame and maintain consistency. Suggestion: Use past tense verbs (loved, enjoyed) when describing past routines.

× When I was a child, I would go to the park with my sister, my older sister.

✓ When I was a child, I would go to the park with my older sister.

Repeating 'my sister, my older sister' is redundant and disrupts sentence flow. This is a sentence structure issue; remove the repetition to make the sentence concise. Suggestion: Keep one clear noun phrase: 'my older sister.'

× Then only we would go back home.

✓ Only then would we go back home.

The adverbial 'only then' should precede the auxiliary in this inverted/emphatic structure or be placed before the verb phrase: 'Only then would we go back home' or 'We would go back home only then.' The original order is awkward and unidiomatic. Suggestion: Place 'only' before 'then' or adjust to 'We would go back home only then.'

× I hate it when it rains because I can't go to the park when.

✓ I hate it when it rains because I can't go to the park then.

The sentence ends with 'when' without completing the clause; 'then' is the appropriate adverb to indicate time in the result clause. This is a sentence structure/word choice error. Suggestion: Use 'then' to refer to that time: 'I can't go to the park then.'

× I am much older now and I still love to go to the park.

✓ I am much older now, and I still love going to the park.

Both forms ('love to go' and 'love going') can be correct, but 'love going to the park' is more natural when describing a habitual activity. Adjusting to the present continuous habitual form improves fluency. Suggestion: Prefer 'love going' for habitual activities.

× I find it very calming walking around the park after a long day at work.

✓ I find it very calming to walk around the park after a long day at work.

After 'find it (adjective)', an infinitive ('to walk') is the more standard structure: 'find it calming to do something.' The gerund 'walking' is understandable but less standard in this pattern. Suggestion: Use 'find it + adjective + to + verb.'

× Going to the park helped me to relax.

✓ Going to the park helps me to relax.

The preceding context is present: the speaker says they still go to the park now. If referring to current repeated effect, use present 'helps.' If referring to past only, keep 'helped.' Choose present to match 'I still love going.' Suggestion: Use present tense when describing ongoing effects.

× It makes me calm.

✓ It makes me feel calm.

The verb 'makes' is fine, but 'calm' needs a linking verb 'feel' to sound natural: 'makes me feel calm.' This is an issue of adjective/pronoun usage and sentence naturalness. Suggestion: Use 'makes me feel calm' or 'it calms me.'

× Yes, I really, I really would love to see more parks in my city with the infrastructures and everything.

✓ Yes, I would really love to see more parks in my city with infrastructure and other facilities.

The repetition 'I really, I really' is redundant. 'Infrastructures' is uncountable in this context; 'infrastructure' is the correct noun. Also 'and everything' is vague; 'other facilities' is clearer. Suggestion: Remove repetition and use 'infrastructure' and a clearer phrase like 'other facilities.'

× I think we are losing a lot of parks, especially in big cities as there are more buildings than trees.

✓ I think we are losing a lot of parks, especially in big cities because there are more buildings than trees.

Using 'as' for 'because' is acceptable in some varieties but can be ambiguous; 'because' is clearer for causal meaning in spoken responses. This is a preposition/conjunction choice for clarity. Suggestion: Use 'because' to express clear cause.

× The city can.

✓ The city can help by creating and protecting more green spaces.

'The city can.' is a fragment lacking a full verb phrase; it leaves the action unspecified. Complete the sentence with what the city can do. This is a sentence structure/verb omission issue. Suggestion: Finish the clause with a clear verb phrase: 'The city can do more to protect parks.'

× I would really love to visit the Central Park in New York.

✓ I would really love to visit Central Park in New York.

'The Central Park' is incorrect because proper names of famous parks usually omit the definite article; 'Central Park' is the established name. This is an article error (but also modal usage is fine). Suggestion: Use the proper noun 'Central Park' without 'the.'

× I really hope I get the chance to go to New York and visit the Central Park in the future.

✓ I really hope I get the chance to go to New York and visit Central Park in the future.

Remove 'the' before 'Central Park' as the park's name does not take the definite article. Also 'I really hope I get the chance' is acceptable; keep modal/time consistency. Suggestion: Omit 'the' before proper names like 'Central Park.'

× Actually, I am planning to go to New York next year and Central Park is on the lease.

✓ Actually, I am planning to go to New York next year and Central Park is on the list.

'On the lease' is incorrect; the intended idiom is 'on the list' (things to do). This is a word choice error leading to an incorrect noun. Replace with 'list.' Suggestion: Use idiomatic expressions like 'on the list' or 'on my list to visit.'

× I will take a lot of photos there.

✓ I will take a lot of photos there.

This sentence is grammatically correct for a future intention. No correction needed. Suggestion: None needed.