Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more grammatical and concise. Start with a clear topic sentence in past tense, then add one or two specific supporting details with linking words. Avoid repetition and fix verb tense and plural forms.

예시: Yes, I enjoyed going to the park as a child. After school, my friends and I would meet there to play football and climb trees, which made those afternoons really memorable.

제안: Use a clear present-tense topic sentence and link reasons with conjunctions. Keep it within 2–3 sentences and avoid awkward phrasing. Correct grammar for verbs and idioms (e.g., "chit-chat"), and separate ideas logically.

예시: Yes, I still like going to parks. Even as adults, my friends and I meet there to chat and play light games because it helps us relax after a busy week.

제안: Clarify the main point and correct word choice and grammar ("parks", "children"). Provide one or two specific benefits with linking words like "because" or "so". Avoid long, run-on sentences.

예시: Absolutely. I would like to see more parks in the city because they give people places to socialise and provide children with safe spaces to play and exercise.

제안: Answer directly with a topic sentence and add a specific example or reason. Use conditional language correctly and be slightly more informative about what you would do there.

예시: I'm not very familiar with the local parks, but if there is a well-known park nearby, I would like to visit it to see its gardens and learn about its history.

× I like to go ahead to park when I was a child because we had many friends gathered together after going to school, coming back from school, it was a time we used to enjoy.

✓ I liked going to the park when I was a child because many friends would gather there after school; it was a time we enjoyed.

IDs: 6 (Present tense issue) and 26 (Sentence structure errors). The original mixes present 'I like' with past context 'when I was a child' and has awkward phrase order ('go ahead to park') and comma splices. Use past tense 'liked' to match 'when I was a child', use 'going to the park' as the natural phrase, and restructure into two clauses or use a semicolon to avoid run-on sentences. Suggestion: keep tense consistency (past for past habits) and separate independent clauses correctly.

× Though we all became grown-ups, still we enjoy gathering together in the park and having some chit chats and play some games together will make us more relaxed after a busy week.

✓ Although we have all become grown-ups, we still enjoy gathering in the park; chatting and playing games together make us more relaxed after a busy week.

IDs: 6 (Present tense issue) and 8 (Verb + -ing form). The sentence mixes tenses and has incorrect coordination: 'having some chit chats and play some games together will make us' is ungrammatical. Use present perfect 'have become' to indicate a change up to now, 'still' placed after subject for natural flow, and parallel gerunds 'chatting and playing' as subjects that take plural verb 'make'. Also replace informal 'chit chats' with 'chatting' or 'small chats'.

× Absolutely yes, because if people are building more and more parts there will be a chance of people getting together and children's are getting more space for themselves to play around with other kids.

✓ Absolutely; if more and more parks are built, there will be more opportunities for people to get together, and children will have more space to play with other kids.

IDs: 11 (Incorrect use of prepositions/words) and 22 (Article errors). 'parts' is incorrect—should be 'parks'. Passive or passive-like construction 'people are building more and more parks' is better expressed as 'parks are built' or 'if more parks are built'. 'Children's are getting more space' is wrong: use 'children will have more space'. Also simplify 'play around with other kids' to 'play with other kids'. Maintain future implication with 'will'.

× I'm not fully aware of the parks that are situated here. If there is a famous park, I would like to go there and explore.

✓ I'm not fully familiar with the parks here. If there is a well-known park, I would like to visit and explore it.

IDs: 4 (Modal verb usage) and 17 (Incorrect use of the definite article). 'Aware of the parks that are situated here' is wordy; 'familiar with the parks here' is natural. 'Famous park' can be 'well-known park'. Use 'visit and explore it' instead of 'go there and explore' for conciseness and to include the object 'it'. The conditional 'If there is...' with 'I would like...' is acceptable; ensure clear object reference.