Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Your answer is clear and relevant, but it's slightly long and has minor grammar issues. Make the opening sentence more natural, correct small grammatical errors, and avoid redundancy. Use a linking word to connect the reason. Keep responses within 2–4 sentences.

예시: Not really. Although there was a small park near my house, it had no playground equipment like swings or slides, so I preferred playing at home with my younger sisters.

제안: The answer addresses the question but contains awkward phrasing and an unclear phrase (“safe travel”). Make sentences more concise, correct tense and phrasing, and use linking words to explain reasons. Mention one clear reason and one brief consequence or preference.

예시: Not really. I rarely visit parks now because I'm busy with schoolwork, and I prefer staying home to create video content for a school project, which has helped me improve my media skills.

제안: Good, specific and well-structured answer. To improve, add a linking phrase for cohesion and a brief example of what facilities would help. Keep it concise and natural.

예시: Yes, I would. There are only two small parks in my neighborhood but three elementary schools and a large kindergarten nearby, so children lack outdoor space; for example, larger parks with playgrounds and sports areas would help.

제안: Answer contains several grammar and clarity problems and minor irrelevancies (“better lunch”). Separate ideas into clear sentences, correct grammar, and explain one specific reason. Use linking words to connect hobby and preference.

예시: Yes. I skateboard as a hobby, and since Tokyo has very few skate parks and many restrictions, I'd love to try the skateboard parks in Los Angeles because they are more spacious and have better facilities for skating.

× I preferred playing at home with my toys with my little sisters.

✓ I preferred playing at home with my toys with my little sister.

The noun 'sisters' (plural) conflicts with the possessive 'my little' when context implies a single sibling; if the speaker has one little sister, use singular 'sister'. If they have more than one, keep 'sisters'. Choose the correct singular/plural to match reality; here likely one sister given 'my little' modifies a single person.

× No, I don't go to the park much nowadays because I don't have time to visit, park or play outside.

✓ No, I don't go to the park much nowadays because I don't have time to visit, go to the park, or play outside.

The phrase 'visit, park or play' is incorrect because 'park' is used as a noun; the verb phrase should be parallel. Use 'go to the park' to maintain correct verb form and parallel structure. Also add commas for list clarity.

× Even if I could, I would prefer to stay home and create video content for my school project since that helped me develop my media skills and safe travel.

✓ Even if I could, I would prefer to stay home and create video content for my school project since that helps me develop my media skills and safe travel.

Tense consistency: main clause uses conditional 'would prefer', and the reason clause should use present tense 'helps' for a general, ongoing effect. 'Safe travel' is unclear and likely ungrammatical; if meaning 'safe travel skills' or 'safety when traveling', revise noun phrase. Here we keep original words but correct verb form to 'helps'.

× Yes, the skateboard park in Los Angeles I skateboard as a hobby and where I live in Tokyo there are very few skate parks and many restrictions.

✓ Yes, the skateboard park in Los Angeles sounds great; I skateboard as a hobby, and where I live in Tokyo there are very few skate parks and many restrictions.

The original is a run-on with missing connectors and unclear clauses. Insert connectors and punctuation to separate ideas: indicate that LA park sounds appealing, state hobby, and contrast with situation in Tokyo. This fixes sentence structure and clarity by adding verbs and conjunctions.

× So I'd love to try skating in LA because the park they're more spacious and have better lunch.

✓ So I'd love to try skating in LA because the parks there are more spacious and have better lighting.

Several errors: 'the park they're' is incorrect (contraction 'they're' misused) and subject-verb agreement issue with 'park... have'. Use 'parks there are' for correct order and agreement. 'Better lunch' is inappropriate; likely intended 'better lighting' or 'better facilities'. Replace with 'better lighting' (or 'better facilities') to convey intended meaning. This corrects adjective/adverb misuse and fixes agreement.