Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Bạn trả lời không rõ ràng và lẫn lộn thì hiện tại/ quá khứ; câu quá dài, nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp và phát âm khiến thông điệp khó hiểu. Hãy trả lời trực tiếp, dùng thì phù hợp (past for childhood), chia câu rõ ràng (topic sentence + 1–2 supporting sentences), tránh lặp từ và dùng liên từ đơn giản để nối ý. Cụ thể: nói rõ bạn có thích hay không, nêu lý do cụ thể (ví dụ: ồn ào, không có không gian riêng) và kết thúc bằng câu ngắn gọn.

예시: When I was a child, I enjoyed going to parks because they had open spaces and swings to play on. However, I often got bored if there were too many people or the playground was noisy. Overall, I have fond memories of playing there.

제안: Câu trả lời rõ ý nhưng lặp từ ('now') và thì/ cấu trúc sai ('have a long day in the tournament'). Cần nói ngắn gọn: topic sentence về việc bạn vẫn thích đi công viên, lý do cụ thể (thư giãn, tập thể dục, gặp gia đình), dùng linking words như 'because' hoặc 'so' và tránh lặp lại từ quá nhiều lần.

예시: Yes, I still like going to parks because they help me relax after an intense period of training or competition. For example, after several busy days, I enjoy walking there with my family to unwind and get some fresh air.

제안: Ý tưởng tốt nhưng phát biểu thiếu trật tự và nhiều lỗi ngữ pháp/vocabulary (e.g., 'use usage', 'old pupil'). Nên trả lời trực tiếp, đưa ra lý do cụ thể với số liệu hoặc ví dụ nếu có (ví dụ: dân số tăng, thiếu không gian xanh), dùng liên từ như 'because' hoặc 'so' để liên kết ý và tránh tiếng ừ ồ.

예시: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because our population is increasing and many neighborhoods lack green spaces. More parks would give children and elderly people places to exercise and socialise.

제안: Câu trả lời nêu được tên công viên nhưng lặp và có nhiều tiếng lấp đầy ('umm', 'and uh'), ngữ pháp số nhiều/số ít sai. Nên bắt đầu bằng câu chủ đề (Yes, I would like to visit...), nêu 1–2 lý do cụ thể (playgrounds, greenery, facilities), và kết bằng kế hoạch ngắn gọn.

예시: Yes, I would like to visit Jimmy City Park because it has many playgrounds and large green areas where my children can play. In the future, my family and I also plan to visit Ho Chi Minh City Park to enjoy the fresh air and outdoor activities.

× I don't like going to park with my child because when I go to the park I need to have more time to relax and show time.

✓ I don't like going to the park with my child because when I go to the park I need to have more time to relax and show time.

Use the definite article 'the' before 'park' when referring to a specific place; 'going to park' is ungrammatical in English. Use 'the park' consistently when speaking about the same park.

× I need to listen to music because a child will go to the park.

✓ I need to listen to music because my child will go to the park.

The sentence lacks a clear subject and possessive. Use 'my child' instead of 'a child' to show who you mean. Also ensure the cause-effect relationship is clearer: you listen to music because your child will be at the park.

× I knew his so have a big louder and I and I can't choose to relax my music with my.

✓ I know he is very loud and I can't choose music to relax because of him.

The original uses incorrect verb tense and wrong word order. Replace 'knew' with 'know' for present state, 'his so have a big louder' with 'he is very loud', and restructure to express inability to choose relaxing music. Use proper subject pronouns and adjective placement.

× Now I still like to go into the park now because I have a long day in the tournament.

✓ Now I still like to go to the park because I have long days of tournaments.

Use 'the park' when referring to parks in general habitually and prefer 'go to' rather than 'go into' in this context. Also pluralize 'day' to 'days' and change 'in the tournament' to 'of tournaments' to match intended meaning.

× I have 5 to 6 day play very hard, try hard and now I need to go in the park to have a relax time with my family now.

✓ I have five to six days of playing very hard; I try hard, so now I need to go to the park to relax with my family.

Use words for numbers in text and plural 'days' with 'five to six days'. Use 'go to the park' and 'relax' as a verb not 'have a relax time'. Remove redundant 'now'.

× Yes, I like to see more park in my city because now have a many people use usage need to use them up in my city and have a many uh old pupil go to umm playground to umm play sports in a park yes.

✓ Yes, I would like to see more parks in my city because many people need to use them, and many older children go to playgrounds to play sports in parks.

Use plural 'parks' when speaking generally. Correct word order and choose suitable quantifiers: 'many people', 'many older children'. Remove unclear words like 'usage' and 'use them up'. Use 'playgrounds' and 'parks' as plural nouns.

× In my future I want to go Jimmy City Park because Jimmy City Park they have umm, many playground, have a fresh and, and uh, I think in my future my family go to the Ho Chi Minh City Park.

✓ In the future I want to go to Jimmy City Park because it has many playgrounds and fresh air, and I think my family will go to Ho Chi Minh City Park.

Use 'in the future' or 'in my future' consistently and 'go to' with park names. Replace 'they have' with 'it has' for a singular park. Pluralize 'playgrounds' and clearly say 'fresh air'. Use future tense 'will go' for planned future action.