Parks— Part 1 채점 보고서

제안: Be more concise and correct simple grammar. Start with a clear topic sentence, then give one or two specific supporting details. Avoid tense errors (use past simple) and redundant phrases.

예시: Yes, I loved going to parks as a child. I often went with my dad and sister and we enjoyed cycling and playing on the swings. Those visits were exciting because we spent hours racing each other and exploring the playground.

제안: Give a direct topic sentence and then one clear reason. Use correct expressions (e.g., "these days" or "nowadays") and improve sentence structure. Avoid awkward phrases like "entertaining children"; say "mainly for children" or "mostly for families."

예시: Not really. Nowadays I seldom go to parks because I find them mostly geared toward children and families. I usually only go there when I need to accompany my younger sister.

제안: Answer directly and organize reasons with linking words (because, so, and). Use accurate grammar and reduce filler words. Provide one specific benefit and an example to be more convincing.

예시: Yes, I would like more parks in my city because they provide fresh air and help people relax. For example, a small park near my office would be a great place for workers to take short breaks and reduce stress.

제안: Be specific about the park and use correct future expressions ("in the next three years" or "someday"). Avoid vague wording and fix grammar (e.g., "well maintained and very clean"). Give one clear reason and a brief supporting detail.

예시: Yes. In the next three years I would like to visit parks in Japan, such as Kenrokuen Garden, because they are well maintained and exceptionally clean. I want to see the beautiful landscaping and traditional scenery at least once in my life.

× 'For nowadays, I'm not quite going to the park.'

✓ 'Nowadays, I don't go to the park much.'

'For nowadays' is incorrect; use 'Nowadays' to talk about the present. The phrase 'I'm not quite going to the park' mixes present continuous with an adverb of frequency and is ungrammatical. Use the simple present with an appropriate frequency adverb: 'I don't go... much.' This fits the present habitual meaning.'

× 'I feel like it's no longer interesting to me because I grew up now and I think it's the place where entertaining children and I just went there to accompany my little sister.'

✓ 'I feel like it's no longer interesting to me because I have grown up, and I think it's mainly a place for entertaining children, and I only go there to accompany my little sister.'

'I grew up now' mixes past tense with present time; use present perfect 'have grown up' to show change up to now. 'the place where entertaining children' lacks proper verb forms; use 'a place for entertaining children.' 'I just went there' uses past tense incorrectly for habitual present action; use 'I only go there.' Overall, use present perfect and simple present for current states and habits.'

× 'For me, I would love to see more gardens or green places in my country because, uh, at a place where providing fresh air and it's can release people's stresses.'

✓ 'I would like to see more gardens and green spaces in my country because they provide fresh air and can relieve people's stress.'

'For me' is unnecessary here but acceptable; main errors are prepositions and article usage. 'at a place where providing' is incorrect; use plural subject 'they provide' or 'places that provide.' 'it's can release people's stresses' mixes 'it is' with modal 'can' and uses plural 'stresses' awkwardly—use 'can relieve people's stress.' Also 'green places' is better phrased as 'green spaces.'

× 'It's a very good place to entertaining people and it's a place where people go there to relax.'

✓ 'It's a great place to entertain people, and people go there to relax.'

'to entertaining' wrongly uses the -ing form after 'to' which needs the base verb 'entertain.' The second clause 'where people go there to relax' is redundant: use either 'where people go to relax' or 'people go there to relax.' Also 'very good' can be more concise as 'great.'

× 'Are there any parks you want to go to in the future?' (Student reply) 'In the next three-year, there are places or parks that I would like to go, especially in Japan.'

✓ 'In the next three years, there are places or parks I would like to visit, especially in Japan.'

'three-year' should be plural 'three years' and hyphenated form would be wrong here. 'would like to go' is acceptable but 'visit' is more natural for parks and places. Keep simple future intention by using 'would like to' or 'I want to visit.'

× 'Is this a place that well maintained and it's very cleans there.'

✓ 'It is a place that is well maintained, and it is very clean there.'

'well maintained' needs auxiliary 'is' to form the passive: 'is well maintained.' 'it's very cleans' uses the verb 'clean' as if a verb with 's'—should be adjective 'clean.' Also avoid contraction 'it's' twice in close succession if clarity is needed; use full 'it is' if preferred.'

× 'Uh, the sightseeing that is very beautiful.'

✓ 'The sights there are very beautiful.'

'the sightseeing that is very beautiful' is awkward: 'sightseeing' is an activity, not the scenery. Use 'sights' or 'scenery' and plural verb agreement: 'The sights are very beautiful.' This corrects noun choice and present tense agreement.'

× 'We went back to cycling and playing around in the playground.'

✓ 'We used to go cycling and play around in the playground.'

'We went back to cycling' is unclear; to express a habitual past activity, use 'used to go cycling' or 'we would go cycling.' Also maintain parallel verbs: 'go cycling and play around' or 'go cycling and playing' needs consistency; use base verb 'play.' 'Went back to' implies returning, which likely is not intended.'

× 'So I want to see it once in a lifetime.'

✓ 'So I want to see it at least once in my lifetime.'

'once in a lifetime' normally means a unique experience; the phrase 'see it once in a lifetime' is nonstandard. Use 'at least once in my lifetime' or 'once in my lifetime' without 'see it' repetition. The suggested correction clarifies the intended meaning.'